


If You're Hurting, So Am I

by Pixiestick_cc



Series: A Different Goal Universe [3]
Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Interspecies Relationship(s), Long-Term Relationship(s), Mild Language, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-20
Updated: 2016-10-06
Packaged: 2018-07-25 13:44:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 26,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7535002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pixiestick_cc/pseuds/Pixiestick_cc
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a year together, Nick and Judy face their first real test as an interspecies couple. Sequel to 'A Different Goal'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Not as long as 'A Different Goal'. A bit more angsty, and mostly from Nick's POV this time.

The broken body that everyone came to visit- giving Judy cards and gifts, and saying how sorry they were about what happened- wasn’t the real Judy. She’d never been one to wallow in her misery. She just wasn’t built that way. If there was a problem, Judy tackled it head on, and if she couldn’t figure it out, she’d spend all the time in the world obsessing over how to fix it. But this problem already had an answer. An answer she hated, because it meant doing the opposite of what her instincts told her to do. It meant doing nothing. It meant not being Judy Hopps.

She shouldn’t have to stay at home for a week, and then do desk duty at work until her body completely healed. She wasn’t even hurt all that much. A broken ankle, black eye, and twisted wrist were amateur hour when it came to police work. But that’s not what Bogo had said after checking in on Judy at the emergency room. She needed time to get back to full capacity, and it was an order she loathed. He’d also recommended she file a report on the incident, but Judy declined. It was her dumb fault, and not even injuries that happened while she was on the job. Just some stupid reaction she had on a night that was supposed to be a happy one, but turned ugly near its end.

But even worse than all that, was the effect her injuries had on Nick. She may have had a broken body, but he had a broken spirit. And while her bones and ligaments would heal with time, Judy wasn’t so sure the same was true for him. She tried her darndest to turn his heavy heart around, but whenever Nick looked at her it was just his reminder of what happened and the reason he was still quietly brooding days after her accident.

She was hurt and Nick blamed himself.

 

* * *

 

_(three days prior)_

There was a hoarse _good morning_ from somewhere nearby, pulling at a sleeping Nick’s conscious. The voice was instantly recognizable to him, and even though he wasn’t fully awake yet, Nick forced his eyelids open, because she was exactly the sight he wanted to see.

Judy in the morning was always a kick in the gut reminder of how damn lucky he was to wake up beside her, and this particular AM, Judy was laying on her side, facing him, with a half-smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. And like always, it gave Nick that overwhelming sense of striking it rich. Clumsily, through the haze of early morning pre-coffee brain, Nick reached for Judy, pulled her closer, and she rested her head against his chest. “Mornin’,” he finally replied, his voice thick with sleep.

“Soooo … I was wondering if you knew what today was?” she asked, speaking over the noisy Saturday morning traffic just outside their bedroom window.

Nick could hear the smile in her chipper voice, and knew the reason behind it. One quick glance at their wall calendar showed a red circle drawn around that day’s date. Judy had placed it there after Nick gave Clawhauser the money to buy them tickets to a Gazelle concert. As a top tier member of the singer’s fan club, Clawhauser got some special super fan discounted price. Normally, Nick wouldn’t have had the money for more than one ticket to a Gazelle show (not without saving up for months anyway), but when Clawhauser realized it was the year anniversary of Nick’s Hare speech to Judy, he all but forced his discounted tickets on them. Yes, their cheetah co-worker and excitable neighbor knew about the Hare speech … and a lot of other things Nick wished he didn’t. But in this case, it got him two tickets to see Gazelle for the price of one, so he could hardly complain.

But even if Nick knew what special day it was, that didn’t mean he was about to let on that he did. It wasn’t in his nature to be so forthcoming. “Hmmm, let me think. It’s not your birthday, that’s still a few months away. So, could it be- why yes, I’m pretty sure that it’s ...” He let his unspoken answer hang heavily in the air between them, causing Judy to shoot her head up and stare at him expectantly.

“What?” she squeaked.

“The anniversary of when you showed me your _Backstreet Bunnies_ shirt. Ah, what a night. So embarrassing for you though. Not sure why you brought it up,” he said with a wink, and then chuckled when her ears fell, and the expectant look turned sour. She tried to roll away, but Nick wound his arms around her torso, pulling a surprised Judy back down against his chest.

“Hey!” she shouted.

“Hey!” he imitated her. “Where you off to?”

“To get breakfast- you know- since my boyfriend wants to tease on our anniversary instead of share in my excitement.”

Nick moved a pad on his paw up between her eyes to momentarily erase Judy’s glower. “Don’t worry, Carrots, I know _exactly_ what day it is and what we’re doing tonight.” Then after a pause he added, “ _And_ what you’ll be wearing.”

“The purple dress is debatable. You have to play your cards right to earn that.” Judy smirked and then gleefully thumped his chest, her demeanor changing on a dime. “Well, aren’t you excited?” A wide smile spread across her face.

For Gazelle? Not particularly. That type of music was more Judy and Clawhauser’s thing. But making his girlfriend happy? That was something to look forward to and so he told her, “Yes.” And to prove his point, he tried to kiss Judy, but she swiftly moved out of Nick’s reach, complaining about his morning breath. “So that’s how it is? You won’t even kiss me until I’ve brushed my teeth? Has the passion died between us? And on days of all days it had to be on our anniversary?” Nick sighed dramatically.

Judy shrugged, unaffected by his sham emotional outburst. “Oh, the passion is still there,” she informed him with a wry smile. “But I just figure after a year of kissing you, I’m allowed to use a little more discretion when I put my mouth against yours. So go brush your teeth and I’ll show you just how passionate I can be when you have good breath.”

Nick snickered and raised one brow a fraction. “Well, if we’re being honest here, right now your breath isn’t exactly the greatest either.”

“So why don’t we go brush our teeth?” Judy suggested. “Might as well make this anniversary kiss enjoyable for both of us.”

“Well, if the missus says so, I must oblige.” Nick slunk out of bed and then offered his paw to Judy. “After you, of course. The one with the worst smelling breath goes first.”

Judy rolled her eyes, and then like the conventionally boring couple they’d become, the two brushed their teeth side by side. But that was okay with Nick. As mundane as it was, he appreciated the dull aspects of their coupledom. Most moments were enhanced by Judy’s presence. Even teeth brushing.

Before Judy, Nick had never been exposed to the charming yet humdrum qualities of domestic life. His dad had bolted early on and Nick’s only memory of that stain on his life was the yelling. So much of it that when he left, Nick was actually glad. Not his mom though. She’d never came out and said it, but he suspected she blamed herself. He never saw his mom with anyone else after that, and Nick became the only fox in her life she cared about.

And because of that, Nick had viewed love as a scam. His dad used his mom until he got bored. Love was his lie she depended on, and it was the lie she clung to until her death … never realizing she’d been hustled. Love's truth was in its manipulation of the weak. And Nick wasn't weak.

But then Nick fell in love and well, his opinion changed.

It took him a little while to get there- with the help of a bunny nudging him along the way- but after a time, it became clear that love wasn’t always a scam. Sometimes it could be true and sickeningly sweet like one of Judy’s romantic comedies.

And it was the feeling of never wanting to lose what he had with Judy- with all its boring and dull moments alongside the passionate ones- that prompted Nick towards his next big life change. Joining the police academy had been the first. Telling Judy he loved her was the next. Now a year later, Nick was ready to make his domestic bliss permanent- another change that would complete his trifecta of upgrades.  

After spending a good amount of the morning in bed, Nick and Judy finally left their bedroom antics behind, with Judy rushing off to the kitchen to make anniversary blueberry pancakes, while Nick held back, waiting to be sure his girlfriend was fully occupied, before moving over to their tiny closet. Once Nick heard the soft humming of her favorite Gazelle song, he knew she was in cooking mode, and then went to find his police uniform. Nick needed reassurance that the ring was still in the pocket he'd placed it in. Although, it was hardly necessary. This was just a scene he reenacted several times daily. Ever since deciding he wanted to ask Judy to marry him, Nick constantly checked in on the ring burning a hole in his uniform's pocket. And as was the case when he inspected his pocket the night before, his mom’s ring was still there.

The piece of jewelry was plain, nothing special. It hadn’t even been a wedding band or engagement ring. Just a boring piece of jewelry his mom always wore and one he made sure to take with him after her accident. But Nick knew Judy well enough to guess this was what she wanted. Not some fancy thing from a shop that cost him too much money, but a piece of his past that meant something. She was sentimental like that … and damn it, so was he. He’d probably have to get the thing resized, but couldn’t do that until Judy tried it on, and that wasn’t an option until he popped the question.

Nick had been waiting for the right time, always keeping the ring inside his uniform pocket just in case the moment came when he least expected it. But now he realized that tonight was the night. He’d wait until after the concert. She’d already be in a good mood and more likely to say yes. Not that he thought Judy would tell him no, but Nick wanted to make sure all the stars aligned for them, because no one mattered more to him than her, and he wanted assurance that their moment would count as one of the greatest.

And then the bunny he’d been thinking of, called his name from the kitchen, forcing Nick to let the ring fall back to the pocket’s bottom. Quickly, he walked over to the open bedroom door, and smiled at the sight of Judy cooking. As a farmer’s daughter, cooking and baking were second nature to her, and at that moment, she was standing over their tiny stove, humming, and looking every bit as beautiful as she always did. Wow, was he ever a sap for her, and sliding up behind Judy, Nick seductively asked. “Did you call?” while winding his arms around Judy’s middle and nuzzling the nape of her neck. But she just kept on flipping pancakes, like his nearness was no big deal, and then asked a question about some case they’d been mulling over. An idea had hit her and she’d gone from the loving and tender Judy from earlier to the no nonsense investigator that also existed inside her. These were the two sides of Judy Hopps, and Nick loved both of them equally.

Enough to marry her.


	2. Chapter 2

“Do you have a plan, or an extra special way you’re going to ask her? Ohhhh, maybe you could recite another one of Judy’s favorite movies.”

Nick paused at the washing machine and had to force himself not to laugh in Clawhauser’s face at his over the top suggestion. “You know, I’m thinking I don’t wanna lean too heavily on the movie monologuing. You do it more than once, you’re bound to be pigeonholed,” Nick replied and then threw the wet shirt and tie he was holding, into the dryer.

“Oh, right right right right. Much too cliche. We need to come up with something more original.”

“We?” Nick looked at him questioningly.

“Well,  _you_ later, of course, but  _we_ right now. I’m helping!”

“Sure.” Nick nodded, and then did a little wink and finger gun combo before twisting around to turn the dryer on. “ _Helping_.”

They were down in their apartment complex’s basement. Nick had been alone while putting his clothes in the washing machine, but when he returned to move them to the dryer, Clawhauser had suddenly appeared carrying a basket of his own clothes and it took Nick all of a second to see what was really going on. Clawhauser had a habit of inserting himself into situations when it came to his favorite fox and bunny couple. And this time was no different.

Usually laundry was done Wednesday evenings down at the laundromat. It was part of Nick and Judy’s boring and downright normal couple routine. But today, Nick needed a certain shirt washed, and after realizing it was stuffed under the bed, he'd come down to the basement for the complex’s only washing machine. And just his luck, Clawhauser had to get in on the action, because naturally, his nosy co-worker knew about the ring. He guessed most things right when it came to him and Judy, and ever since guessing this one, he’d shadowed Nick every chance he got, wanting to know if today was the day.

“You know, Clawhauser, I think I’ll just ask her. It may be boring, but I like boring. We have enough excitement at work, and everything else that goes along with her being a rabbit and me a fox.” He was implying the sometimes weird looks and rude phrases hurled their way for being a pred and prey couple. “But don’t worry," Nick was quick to add after seeing disappointment pass over Clawhauser’s face (as if he were the one getting proposed to and not Judy). "I guarantee it’ll be perfect, just not overblown."

Clawhauser bounced back to his normal enthusiastic self after Nick's promise, and asked, “Will you text me afterward? Or better yet, just tell Judy to call me. Or I’ll call her. I should call her. When should I call? Oh, I could call right before you ask, try to set the mood.” Clawhauser’s eyes grew large, which was the start of a facial expression Nick knew would soon manifest as a squeal of delight. “O M goodness! This is just like when Kris proposed to Kim. Of course, that marriage only lasted five months, but that’s not you and Judy. You guys are perfect for each other!” And then came the predicted squeal.

Nick could only assume Clawhauser was referencing some reality show couple, and to get his friend to quiet down, he slid into charm mode. “Look, Ben my friend, do I have your word that you won’t let this slip before I actually propose. It would really suck the air out of this whole thing if she found out via you calling her during the concert asking to know the current status of our relationship.”

Clawhauser shook his head as if what Nick said was the worst thing to ever happen in the history of proposals not to take place on TV. “Oh, I would never ever ever.”

“Good, because when you’re Best Mammal I gotta trust you’ll be able to do the job, and buddy, tonight is your first real test.” He clasped his paw on Clawhauser’s shoulder and gave it a good squeeze. It hadn’t been planned, but Nick’s gut instinct to ask Clawhauser to be his Best Mammal, made sense. Judy would appreciate the gesture of having their eccentric cupid standing at the altar with them.

A moment passed before Clawhauser fully got what Nick was saying, but soon enough he began making high pitched noises again. The sounds were short lived though, because he seemed to realize that his display wasn’t Best Mammal behavior, and suppressing his tendency to always wear his excitement on his sleeve, Clawhauser cleared his throat and soberly stated, “Yes, of course. I’ll do my best.”

“Good. So, uh no calling or texting Judy tonight, okay? I’ll text  _you_ … Best Mammal.” Nick winked.

Clawhauser nodded, with a barely contained squeal bubbling just below the surface. “You can count on me.”

“Attaboy!” Nick slapped his friend’s shoulder and then took a few steps up the stairs leading back to his shared apartment with Judy, but stopped midway to turn around again. “Next time you see me, I may just be an engaged fox. Well, that is if she says yes.”

Clawhauser giggled like Nick had made the funniest joke ever and Nick laughed too. Although his wasn’t as genuine, because even if he hated to admit it, Nick's cynical side wasn’t quite so confident and felt a shadow of doubt.

* * *

 

“Are you fluffing serious?  _That’s_  what you’re wearing? After all your pestering for me to put this on?” Judy made a sweeping motion with her paw down her dress. “This is way too fancy for a concert that has male tigers dancing around wearing tight sparkling shorts. But I put it on for you.”

“I thought you’d appreciate the hint of nostalgia that came along with this shirt and tie,” Nick defended against Judy’s slight incredulousness over his outfit.

“Nostalgia for a shirt you only just stopped wearing a few months ago?” Judy’s tone cooled some, but she still wasn’t entirely convinced with his excuse.

True, Nick had only stopped wearing his green Hawaiian shirt and striped tie mix, because he couldn’t find it until that afternoon, but that wasn’t the point. “ _This_  is what I was wearing when we met, and what I wore for the majority of those first couple of months, because well, I didn’t exactly own a lot of clothes back then. But, yeah, when I wear this, I usually think of that time and get nostalgic. Come on, work with me here, Whiskers. Doesn’t it strike a chord with you too? Want me to try and hustle you for added effect?”

“What? Are you going to pull Finnick out dressed in his elephant costume too?” Judy sarcastically asked and Nick chuckled.

“Nah, I asked, but he was too busy.”

Judy giggled, but then grew quiet as she mulled over his explanation; her nose twitched as she thought. “I guess,” she finally said, “when you put it that way …” her voice trailed off as she moved towards him, “it does make me feel something.” Then Judy grasped his striped tie and gave it a hard yank, forcing Nick’s snout to come crashing down against her mouth for a kiss. “Okay then,” Judy breathlessly stated after letting the tie go, causing Nick to stumble back some. “I’m not wearing this dress anymore.”

“What? Why?” Nick complained as he straightened his tie.

“Because if you get to be comfortable while also being nostalgic, then so do I.” Judy turned her back to Nick, requested, “A little help?” and he unzipped her dress.  Shrugging out of it, Judy let the fabric glide to the floor in a pool of purple, before tugging down a pink flannel patterned shirt from their closet. “The day I wore this was pretty eventful, wouldn’t you say?” Judy mentioned, as she pushed her arms through the shirt’s sleeves and then began buttoning its front.

“Oh yeah, good times … I got in a fight with some old rabbit,” Nick snickered.

“Among other things.” Judy looped the last button through its hole and went over to their dresser, pulling out a pair of jeans. “Too bad there aren’t any sunflowers around or I’d push you down in them. I’m feeling  _nostalgic_.”

“Well then, let me introduce you to my friend, the bed, here. Extremely useful for pushing me down on.” Nick stopped talking briefly, to take in Judy’s laugh- he loved hearing that sound- and then mimicked the phrase Judy had used earlier, “ _Among other things_.”

Judy snorted at the insinuation. “Maybe later, but right now we have a show to catch. No time for any of that.”

“Yeah, wouldn’t want to be late,” Nick agreed somewhat begrudgingly while reaching into his pants pocket, repeating his habit of making sure the ring was where it needed to be. But then his phone buzzed from his other pocket and Nick pulled it out to see a text from Clawhauser staring back at him. The words ‘good luck’ were followed by three smiley face emojis and one Nick had never used before (it looked like confetti coming out of a horn). Then finally there was the diamond ring emoji. Nick groaned and shoved his phone back in his pocket.

“Who was that?” Judy asked, coming to stand beside him, fully dressed and ready to go.

“Nothing. Just Clawhauser being his typical meddling self,” Nick replied. Then taking Judy’s paw in his, he led her out through their apartment door and into the hallway. Nick had just finished turning his key in the lock, when a familiar cheerful tenor surprised him.

“Have fun, you two!” Clawhauser enthused, and Nick wheeled around to see their ever present neighbor standing a few feet from the stairs leading outside. “Just ordered a pizza,” he explained. “I was about to go down and wait for it, but remembered you two were going to see Gazelle soon. Thought I’d walk down with you.”

“Oh, that is so sweet, Clawhauser,” Judy said, while Nick tried not to roll his eyes. “And thanks again for helping us out with the tickets.”

“Anything for my favorite couple,” he giggled.

They weren’t able to shake Clawhauser completely until entering their cab, but Nick took it all in stride. If anything, it showed just how dedicated he was to them and how he’d take that with him into the wedding. “He seemed extra enthusiastic tonight,” Judy commented as she waved Clawhauser goodbye from the taxi’s backseat. “And that’s saying something, because he’s Clawhauser.”

“You know how he gets about Gazelle,” Nick deflected. “I bet he just wants to live vicariously through us.”

“Yeah, you're probably right,” Judy responded, as she leaned into Nick beside her. “How about you? Excited?”

He shrugged and mumbled, “Ehh.” It was false indifference; Judy was well aware of this, but still punched his shoulder anyway. Nick groaned and then chuckled. “Of course, I am, Carrots. Who wouldn’t be? I’m the luckiest fox in the city tonight, because I’m with you.”

“And don’t you forget it.”

“Trust me, that’s not ever going to happening.”

Judy kissed Nick then, but they pulled abruptly apart seconds later at the sound of a cough coming from up front. Having been through this many times before- whether it be fake coughing, a muttered phrase of disgust, or a shocked gasp- Judy gave the reaction she always did when this happened. She huffed and shot the driver a glare for his clear attempt to voice his disapproval. Judy probably would have gone into a lecture about tolerance too if the pig cab driver hadn’t started talking.

“Excuse me,” he timidly said. “I’m sorry to interrupt, but are you two the cops that solved the Night Howler case?”

And then Nick heard Judy sigh. It wasn’t going to be one of  _those_ times; relief- like a cool drink on a hot day- washed over him. Having their pred and prey relationship called into question would've more than likely cast a dark shadow over the evening and mucked up his proposal plans.

“Yes, we are those cops,” Judy brightly answered.

“Wow! Mind if I get an autograph before you leave?”

“No, problem, sir. We here and the ZPD are here to serve and if an autograph is what you need-”

“Then an autograph is what you’ll get,” Nick finished for her, provoking Judy to raise her brows as she tilted her head to the side. “Can’t help it if I know you so well that I can finish your sentences,” Nick answered the question in her expression.

“As long as it wasn’t done to mock me,” Judy lifted her chin, like a challenge.

“Definitely ... maybe.” He tapped her nose.

“You’re such an incorrigible fox,” she sighed.

“Admit it. That's the part you like most about me.”

Judy answered by reaching around his neck and continuing the kiss that had been left hanging. And by the time she settled back into her seat, Nick felt a renewed hope for an evening that would lead to greater things.


	3. Chapter 3

By now, Nick was immune to the sideways glances and quickening steps he often encountered out of his police uniform. For a fox, that was just the routine of life; most others wanted to pretend he wasn’t there, so they escaped him first chance they got.

And when Nick started dating Judy, they experienced a variation of this reaction. Some would glance, avert their gaze, and then once it appeared that neither bunny nor fox were looking (but Nick usually was) they’d make either a confused or angry expression. On a rare occasion, there was a mammal willing to step over that line and take their negative emotions further. Exhibit A: Judy’s good ol’ Grandpop.

But that was just par for the course. Being together meant going against a world that liked to shove its mammals into little boxes of who they had to be. Of course, Judy was never one to stay put in a box, and along the way had helped Nick step out of his. Now they were pushing against the norm even more, and their relationship was bound to get others steamed up from time to time.

And as they moved through the crowd at the concert venue, with large groups of mammals of all kinds standing around, clutching their drinks and talking with one another, Nick saw a few reacting to them holding paws. Judy didn’t notice, or maybe she just didn’t care. The looks never seemed to bother her as much as they did him. That was because Nick was always hyper aware of anything that might affect her negatively. In his mind, most weren’t judging Judy insomuch as they were intolerant of him being with her.

 _I don’t like you_ became _I don’t like you and why are you adding your fox stink to this cute bunny?_ Even if Judy tried to convince him this wasn’t the case, Nick assumed most of the judging stemmed directly from who he was. But tonight, Nick wouldn't let it get to him. He had more important things to focus on, and his paw once again grasped the ring just to make sure it was still secure in his pocket. No surprise- it was.

The last time he and Judy were at a Gazelle concert, it had been a free, outdoor event to celebrate them solving the Night Howler case. Now they were in the theater where Gazelle took up residency when she wasn’t out touring. It was a bit classier and not general admission like the other place. And thanks to Clawhauser’s discount, Nick was able to afford front row seats- a detail he’d kept secret from Judy so he could see her surprise when she realized they were down front.

“Nick, I think the stairs to the balcony are back that way,” she informed him when he led her further into the theater. But Nick ignored her, releasing her paw and rushing ahead, forcing Judy to chase after him. When she finally caught up, he was sitting in one of their front row seats.

“Care to join me?” He patted the seat to his right, and sent her a lopsided grin.

Then he saw it- the look he’d been waiting for. Surprise mixed with excitement rushed over Judy's face as her ears shot up and she shouted, “You liar!” A few mammals nearby looked their way. “These are _not_ balcony seats.” She was smiling stupidly, and clasping her paws like some schoolgirl with stars in her eyes.

“Did I say balcony? Hmmm, my mistake. The seating chart was so hard to see on my phone’s small screen,” Nick casually remarked, and then standing, he gestured to her seat. “Only the best for you, Carrots. Happy anniversary.”

And suddenly their roles were reversed. Judy hopped up onto her seat and surprised him with a kiss. It was a deep long kiss that she only pulled away from when an usher informed her that standing on seats wasn’t allowed. “Sorry,” she mumbled, and stepped down.

“Heh. With a response like that, I should lie to you more often,” Nick joked once the usher walked away. “Hey, have I ever told you how much I love it when you cook with carrots.”

Judy snorted. “Now that’s a lie you’d never be able to get past me.”

Nick shrugged. “Well, if I can’t offer you up a lie, can I get you a drink instead as it did lead to our first kiss?”

She smirked. “Actually, that sounds great. But not too strong, okay? I want to be able to remember this night.”

“Got it. Nothing that’s gonna get you up on that stage dancing alongside Gazelle’s backup dancers with their tight sparkly shorts,” Nick teased with a wink.

Playing along, Judy tapped her chin, pretending to be in deep contemplation. “You know, I’m starting to rethink my drinking strategy, because if I do get up on stage, I just might be able to get one of those tiger’s numbers.” Nick slowly raised his brow and Judy shoved him. “Don’t look so upset. I was only kidding.”

Had he looked upset? His aim was to appear shocked, but in that exaggerated way she knew was fake. Maybe she’d struck a raw nerve of jealousy. Judy seemed to be the only one who could ever make him screw up a tease, but Nick would have to be on his deathbed before he’d even consider admitting that to her. “Ha what? You fell for that? I was just _pretending_ to take you seriously. Look who the jokes on now.” His explanation sounded terribly phony, which only made Judy giggle in a way he perceived as her laughing _at_ him and not _with_ him. Nick knew he’d have to stop digging his hole if he wanted save face. “So, one drink, coming up,” he said and dashed through the crowd to get away from Judy.

The auditorium was set up in three different sections based on mammal size. As medium sized mammals, Nick and Judy were seated in the center, but the bar was set up near the back of the right section where all the larger mammals sat. Nick managed to navigate his way through the elephants, rhinos, and all other assortment of big mammals, but on his way back from the bar- holding two drinks in each paw- he stumbled. One of the drinks sloshed against his favorite shirt and then fell to the floor. Nick watched as it rolled away down the aisle.

Unsure of what he’d tripped on- as the isle was clear of any mammals- Nick glanced around and caught sight of a foot being pulled back behind a seat. Bringing his gaze up to see who that foot belonged to, he saw a rhino staring his way, almost like he was challenging Nick to retaliate. And in that instant, a thousand and one ways to scam this jerk, flooded his head. It didn’t matter that he was less than half the bully’s size. Nick could figure out how to take anyone down when it was brains versus brawn. But he only entertained a few of those thousand and one game plans of counter attack, before letting them fade from his mind, deciding that the rhino wasn’t worth it. Nick didn’t want to distract himself from Judy and the important life event he’d planned for later that evening. With a shrug and sarcastic wave at the rhino- a slight dig to let him know just how unaffected he was by the whole incident- Nick turned on his heel, leaving the negativity behind.

“You didn’t get yourself anything?” Judy asked when he returned moments later and she saw only one drink in his paw. Then her eyes flicked down to his wet shirt and up again to his face.

“I tripped,” Nick explained.

Judy frowned. “I’ll go get you another one,” she offered, but he shook his head.

“I’m our designated driver, remember?”

Judy snickered. “We took a cab here.”

Nick only gave a half-shrug in response, and as intuitive as Judy was when it came to him, she let the subject drop, choosing instead to play along by clucking her tongue while pulling a handkerchief from her purse. “Such a clumsy fox,” she chided and began sopping up the spilled drink from his shirt.

Nick was well aware that Judy would see past his fake explanation, but had lied anyway. Sometimes it was just easier for both of them to pretend like nothing happened. He didn’t think going over these sort of things with Judy did any good anyway. Like always, he’d just accept it as a part of his life and move on, and as a result she wouldn’t have any reason to worry. Because damn it, he’d try his hardest to protect Judy from the collateral damage that came with her choosing to be with a fox.

* * *

 

From time to time, Judy liked to visualize her boyfriend’s temperament as being a river that glided smoothly over rocks and any other would be disturbances in its way. That was because Nick hardly ever let anything get to him. But every now and then he’d hit a metaphorical dam, and when that happened, trickles of his real emotions would push past the barrier. And at that moment, Nick appeared to have hit a dam. He was always cool about it, but Judy could tell. Even when they weren’t dating, she could see through his pretense. And it was usually then that Judy had to decide if it was worth prodding him to get the truth. She’d pick which wounds to investigate and which to leave alone. She had to. If Nick felt Judy was pushing too hard all the time, he was likely to shut down, and when that happened it became almost impossible to get him past his emotional hiccup.

It was between brushes of her handkerchief against the fabric of Nick’s shirt, that Judy conceded this would be one of those keep quiet moments. They were celebrating their anniversary, and clearly Nick hadn’t wanted to put a damper on the evening by mentioning what he’d encountered on his way back from the bar. So she let this one go.

But as the lights dimmed and the opening act took stage, Judy wasn’t able to completely forget. These sort of things always stayed with her. His unspoken pain was hers, and the fact that their relationship still had these constraints where she was forced to ignore his emotional strife to keep Nick from closing himself off to her, was a thorn in her paw. She wanted to take away his hurt, and as someone with the inclination to fix everything, not being able to work on Nick left Judy feeling restless. They may have made progress in the past year, but she would never be satisfied until this facade of _nothing is wrong_ , was put to rest once and for all.

And while Judy did enjoy the concert immensely, dancing around in her seat and shouting out all the lyrics at the top of her lungs (and consequently annoying the mammal sitting beside her that she wasn't currently dating), her worry over Nick’s shirt incident resurfaced as soon as they left the venue. It caused a resolve to grow in her heart that once they were home she would try and get a conversation going about what had happened. Maybe after a few anniversary kisses he’d soften up and let her see past his guise.

But Judy soon found that Nick had no intention of going straight home. “The night is still young, my dear,” he said in that supercilious voice he so often used while trying to imitate Mr. Darcy for her.

Not _that_ young, Judy thought. It was after 11 and even if they both had requested the next day off of work, she was still tired. A walk after two hours of dancing just didn’t seem wise. But when she opened her mouth to quibble, Nick stopped her with a soft plea of, “Please. There’s something I’ve been wanting to show you.”

Judy’s objection died in her throat after hearing the sincerity in his tone. Nick wasn’t teasing. This was either good or bad. As long as he was cracking jokes, things were usually fine. That didn’t mean they were perfect, but Nick being his typical self, indicated to her that nothing monumental was about to take place. If his dial turned serious though, she knew something was up. “Sure, I’ll take a walk with you,” Judy replied, hoping she wasn’t about to receive some bad news.

Nick took her paw and they wandered through the crowd still leaving the theater, before heading down a side street where Nick found a bench for them to sit. “So, this is a super nice bench you wanted to show me,” Judy lightheartedly quipped, and Nick chuckled.

“It is, isn’t it,” he agreed, and then smoothed his paw over the empty side Judy wasn’t occupying. “Good strong metal here.” He hit it with his fist.

A quiet passed between them, and Judy assumed Nick probably needed some help getting to whatever serious thing he was now stalling to mention. “Nick, you didn’t actually bring me over here to show me a bench, did you?”

He drew in a breath and then let it out in a sigh of embarrassment. “You’re right. I didn’t come here to show you a bench.” His paw that had moved over the bench moments before, now reached into his pants pocket, and whatever Nick pulled out, he kept hidden from her in his balled fist. “But it is a nice comparison to you.”

Judy cocked her head to the side while staring at Nick, not sure if she should be offended or amused. “Are you saying I’m a bench?” 

“No, not a bench, but _like_ a bench. You’re reliable, always there to offer comfort to a weary walker. And like a bench, sometimes you’re taken for granted. It’s just assumed you’ll always be there. But I don’t take you for granted, Judy. I never will.”

Her brows drew together in confusion. “Uh, I’m not following you, Nick.”

He swore under his breath, mumbling something or other about how Clawhauser was right, and then abruptly standing, Nick turned to face Judy still sitting on the bench (which she was apparently similar to?). “The truth is ... you make me nervous, Carrots. You're the only mammal I know who can do that to me, and it figures you’d work some of that mojo while I’m trying my hardest to make this meaningful." Closing his eyes, Nick shook his head like he was disappointed with himself. Over what, Judy couldn't guess. But when his gaze finally settled back on her, something had changed, and it caused a sensation like falling from the top of a roller coaster, to grip Judy's insides. “You know, I thought if I didn’t turn this into an overblown event, everything would just work itself out naturally, feel less contrived. But whatever. I'm just going to say it … shit!”

The roller coaster came to a screeching halt. “Excuse me?” It wasn't as if Judy hadn't heard Nick swear before, but she definitely didn't feel like she deserved to be on the receiving end of it. 

Nick’s gaze wasn’t directed at Judy anymore; his line of sight had shifted to just above her left shoulder. “Sorry, that wasn’t for you, but uh, we gotta get going.” Whatever he’d been holding in his paw went swiftly back into his pocket.

“Why do we have to- ohh!”

Nick didn’t let Judy finish; he just reached for her paw and jerked it forward. But after he took a sharp right, Judy’s foot caught on the legs of the bench and she came crashing down onto the sidewalk, losing Nick's paw in the process. After realizing what had happened, her boyfriend apologized profusely, and crouched down to her level, but froze when a deep voice broke over his. “Look Sharon, look! It’s that fox I tripped earlier. Remember? He spilled his drink. All over his shirt! Hey, fox. How's it going? Your shirt still wet?” The taunt then transitioned into a booming laugh that sounded influenced by a few drinks of alcohol.

Nick briefly tensed, but managed to relax as he stood, bringing Judy along with him. “Just ignore him, please, Judy. Do it for me,” he stressed under his breath while attempting to lead them away once more.

Judy was acutely aware of why he’d worded his request as a plea. Nick would rather not face the prejudice against him. He wanted to sweep it under the rug like always, but also knew Judy was hard pressed to leave injustices alone. Yet the mystery of his wet shirt was now answered, and Judy’s love for Nick just wouldn’t let her be a bystander as someone mistreated him.

_Sorry, Nick. I can't let this one go._

“Excuse me, sir, but did I just hear you say you tripped my boyfriend?” Judy asked using the sternest police-rabbit voice she could muster, while turning to stare down the idiot who thought he could push Nick around. Well, he couldn't. Not when Judy Hopps was there to fight back.


	4. Chapter 4

For Nick, this was the worst case scenario.

Yeah, the bench thing had been kinda bad, but also easy to recover from. And down the line Judy would’ve laughed telling her family all about the silly start to a proposal he’d stumbled through. It was a story none in her family of 200 plus rabbits would ever let him live down. But this- the prejudice he faced daily on full display- wasn’t going to transfer well into a cute story. Nothing about this was cute, and it was exactly the type of thing Nick desperately wanted to shield Judy from.

He’d have to chuck the proposal. There was no way to salvage that tonight. Not with Trippy the Rhino on the prowl. Nick just hoped he’d be able to get Judy out of this situation before it turned ugly. So, he tried again, “Please. Let’s just get out of here, Carrots. Come with me.”

But she didn’t. Judy wasn’t even looking at him. Her reckless sense of justice had taken hold and when that happened, Nick might as well have been invisible. There was no reasoning with her. Ironic that she was doing this for him, yet not listening to how he felt about it.

“What? _He’s_ your boyfriend?” The way the rhino spoke didn’t exactly show he was all that accepting of their pairing, which wasn’t a surprise. One prejudice usually wasn’t enough for mammals like him. His heart probably contained a whole crayon box filled with different shades of hate.

“That’s right, sir, this is my boyfriend. And I was wondering if you were aware that it is unlawful for a larger mammal- such as yourself- to use their size and strength against a mammal of smaller size- such as my boyfriend here. Assault is a crime in and of itself when any sized mammal is involved, but if it is a larger mammal against a smaller, there is the possibly of more jail time, depending on the severity of the assault, of course.”

Nick sighed. He should’ve guessed this was the route she’d take. “Judy, we’re off duty and I was tripped, not assaulted. And I don’t care!” He raised his paws in the air, displaying his frustration. Why did she have to be so headstrong all the time?

“Well, you should,” Judy replied reproachfully, sending Nick a quick glance, before taking a few steps forward, undoubtedly on her way to try and intimidate the much larger rhino.

But Nick grasped Judy’s paw and tugged her back. “Stop. I don’t want you to do this. Doesn’t it matter what I want? This happened to me. Not you.”

“That’s ridiculous. I love _you_. Whatever happens to you, happens to me too, and I won’t let him think he can push you around.” Judy pointed at the rhino, who was staring bug-eyed at them as they argued.

“Maybe I don’t mind being pushed around if it means you’re safe.”

“Safe?” She stared at him curiously, her nose twitching ever so slightly.

“Yeah safe, as in- you’re not hurt, because some drunk bonehead thought it’d be cool to smack a fox around and you got in the way. I’ve been dealing with this my whole life. It doesn’t bother me much. But what does bother me is when you put yourself in the middle this. I don’t want you mixed up with all the bad that follows me around.”

Judy raised her chin and propped her paws on her hips. “That’s impossible, Nick. How can you expect me not to get mixed up with everything you are? We’re dating. We live together and work together. You’re the mammal who matters most to me. It can’t be avoided. And besides, we both knew what we were getting into when we decided _this_ ,” she pressed her paw against his chest and then moved it over to hers, “was worth it. And guess what? I still think we’re worth it. So much so, that I won’t stand by while others treat you like you’re worthless. No mammal deserves to be judged based on their species. Not me, and especially not you.” She quieted for a moment, her ardent stance on the issue wavering as a flash of vulnerability flickered over her face. “So, please, stop shutting me out of this part of who you are.”

Judy always had a way of wording things like they were a damn sonnet- beautiful and touching, but more importantly, exactly what Nick needed to hear. And if the moment between them had lasted more than a few seconds, he may have fallen under Judy’s influence, but the grating voice that followed his girlfriend’s affirmation of love, brought Nick swiftly back down to reality.

“Come on, Jim. Let’s go.” Sharon, the other rhino, sounded bored, like she would rather be any other place than listening to an interspecies couple disagree on how to handle intolerance. Nick glanced away from Judy to see Sharon on her phone, leaning against the side of a building, and totally disengaged from what was happening.

But not her date.

“What? No way!” Jim replied with a laugh. “It’s not every day you see a fox and rabbit dating. That's so messed up. Like how does that even work when you’re together … doin’ it?”

“That is none of your business _and_ extremely rude,” Judy snapped, turning away from Nick.

The rhino didn’t seemed fazed. Rude probably wasn’t a bad quality in his book or even a word in his limited vocabulary. “And since you’re prey, don’t you think he might hurt you when he gets excited …” the rhino broke off into a laugh again. “Oh, this is so much better than that dumb concert you made me take you to. I get a freak show! Give me your phone, Sharon.”

Sharon made a noise of contempt. “Fat chance in that. It’s not my fault you threw yours against the wall after losing that dumb game you were playing on it.”

Disregarding what his date said, the rhino snatched the phone away anyways. “Shut your trap. I just gotta get a picture of this.”

Sharon grumbled, but didn’t put up much of a fight, showing signs that she’d most likely been down this road before with him and knew fighting back wasn’t an option. It reminded Nick of what he saw a lot of back in his scamming days. When you took up with lowlifes, you saw more than your fair share of abusive relationships, and Jim looked like he was cut from the same cloth as those types who liked to knock their girlfriends around.

Nick’s hunch sent a shiver of urgency down his spine. He needed to diffuse the situation ASAP. But then a flash of light jolted him, leaving behind glowing white spots in his line of vision. Another flash came quickly after that and then another. Jim was taking pictures of them, but he singled Judy out to intimidate her, since she’d been the one to stand up to him. “Smile for me, bunny. Or do you consider this assault too?”

He got up so close to her, that Nick’s rational side dashed out the car window and anger took over driving duties. “Look, pal- and I use the term pal very loosely here- I’m only gonna ask you once to stop taking pictures of my girl. So here it is. Take note. Please, stop doing that.”

“Okay, no pictures. How about a video?” The rhino leered at Judy and grasped her wrist, shoving the large phone against her body. “Here’s the bunny who likes to mate with foxes, show.”

Nick’s reaction to this was instantaneous and all instinct. In a movement so fluid it could’ve been rehearsed, he yanked Judy free from Jim’s grasp, and used his other paw to take the phone. The device, which was nearly half his size, fell on Nick at first, but he managed to hoist it off and get back on his feet. Then there was a sharp intake of breath from Judy and a loud epithet directed at him from the rhino, as Nick used all his strength to hurl the phone a few feet away into the middle of the road. Seconds later it was crushed under the wheels of a passing car.

“Whoops,” Nick said, and to drive his sarcasm home, he added, “You know, I’ve just been so clumsy tonight, first with the drink and now this. Honestly, I don’t even know how I managed to button my shirt before leaving for the concert. I seem to be all thumbs.” Nick felt triumphant, but before he could really savor the moment, Judy yelled for him to watch out and seconds later it became apparent why. He was on the ground, his back pressed up against the sidewalk, having been shoved there by just a simple nudge from Jimbo the rhino.

And with that, Nick’s smugness was impacted out of him. Now he was forced to deal with the repercussions of his not so well thought out reaction to Judy being threatened. Of course, he’d smile and take it. He had no other choice. At least Judy could get away while he was taking a beating, and call for help or find a cop who was actually on duty and had their dart gun. Nick took comfort in the knowledge that he’d given her a chance to escape from the mess he’d caused.

But when Nick saw the large gray fist raise up to clock him, an alarm sounded in his head. He needed to make sure Judy was actually going to get herself out of there. Knowing his girlfriend, Nick feared she might stick around and try to help him. Unfortunately, the warning never made it all the way out of his mouth, before Nick’s voice splintered off into a loud shout of surprise as Judy hopped in front of him and took the full force of Jim’s blow.

* * *

 

It could have been worse. A lot worse. That’s what she told herself, and that’s what kept coming out of her mouth every time Nick cast a morose glance her way from his chair in the corner.

“I knew what I was doing. It’s a move I perfected at the academy in the boxing ring. Most of the time my opponent was a rhino. My feet should've knocked his fist right into his face. Rabbits have extremely strong hind limbs, you know.”

When Nick didn’t respond- just like he hadn’t the last four times she’d said a variation of this- Judy sighed, and stared down at her body on the hospital bed. Yeah, it could’ve been worse, but there was no getting around that she’d definitely seen better days. Her wrist was sprained, injured during Nick’s move to pull her paw out of the rhino’s grasp, and in the course of her maneuver to protect Nick (which sadly had failed), she’d broken an ankle. Judy also had the beginnings of a black eye, but hadn’t yet seen that. She only knew, because of what the doctor told her. Thankfully, that was the extent of it, because after she went down, some good samaritans saw what was happening and apprehended the attacker.

“This is nothing, Nick. I’m being discharged soon. I don’t even have to stay overnight,” she tried again, wanting desperately to erase the distress etched in his expression.

Nick’s frown deepened as he pressed his paws against his temples and shut his eyes. “Yeah, nothing.” The sarcasm in his voice was hard to miss, but lacked the playfulness she’d grown accustomed to hearing flow alongside it.

Judy wanted to press her- _this isn’t that bad_ narrative further, but the drawn curtain on the other side of her bed kept those words of coaxing locked inside until she and Nick could be alone. No need to put on a show for the patient taking up the other half of the room. So, Judy did the only other thing she could think of. She tried to diffuse the tension with an apology. But apparently that wasn’t what Nick wanted to hear, because his eyes shot open and his expression turned angry. “Don’t apologize for something I brought on you. This is _my_ fault. Not yours.”

Judy was taken aback and couldn’t keep the hurt she felt from bubbling over into her reply. “I don’t know why you’re being like this. I’m only trying to make you feel better.” Her voice was a breath away from a sob. All the frustration she’d been repressing was starting to push through the cracks in her crumbling tough exterior. She was tired and the painkillers weren’t working as well as she would’ve liked, and Nick’s attitude was breaking her spirit. Judy could handle a whole bunch of bad all at once, but put an emotionally distressed Nick into the mess and somehow it tilted the scale all the way over into the negative.

At the sight of Judy starting to crack, Nick’s temper cooled, and for a split second she thought maybe he was about to open up. But that hope was dampened, when she saw him switch back to that same sullen expression he’d been wearing since they'd entered the emergency room. “I didn’t mean to …” he shook his head. “You just don’t understand.” Nick’s shoulders drooped as he placed his head down and started at his paws.

“Nick, look at me.” Judy tried to find her inner calm to help bring him back to where he'd been at the start of the night, when they were just a happy couple celebrating their anniversary. “None of this is your fault. All the blame goes to that jerk who antagonized us, not you.”  

But her boyfriend wasn't having it. He let out a disbelieving noise, and stood. “I’m going outside for some fresh air. Call me if the doctor comes back before I do.” His voice was soft, but also sounded defeated and it made Judy’s heart ache.

Minutes passed as she waited for Nick to return, her ears shifting towards the open door whenever noises out in the hall made it appear a mammal might be nearby. But eventually, Judy grew restless and pulled out her phone (using the still functioning wrist of her right paw). She meant to call Nick, try to get him to come back, but Judy paused at the sight of a missed text message. Through all the commotion of the evening, she'd somehow overlooked it, and swiping her paw upward on the screen, Clawhauser's name appeared alongside the little post it note icon. Clicking it, Judy saw he'd sent his message about the time she was being transferred into the police cruiser on her way to the hospital.

_I just found out what happened!! omg I can’t believe the night Nick proposes is the same night you end up in the emergency room. wtf. So crazy. Call me when you can xoxoxo_


	5. Chapter 5

Someone was singing Gazelle out of tune. That was the first thing Judy picked up on. The second was that her body ached terribly. But when she tried to open her eyes to get a better picture of what was going on, they seemed to be crusted shut. Judy went to rub them, but stopped the instant her paws came in contact with her eyes. Her left wrist screamed in pain at exactly the same moment her right eye echoed that wrist’s sentiment. It was enough of a kick to her senses that a fuzzy memory of the night before shoved its way to the forefront of her mind.

_The black eye and sprained wrist._

“Cheese and crackers!” she yelled, and shot up in bed, which in hindsight wasn’t the smartest, since her whole body was already aching. Moving so fast made it scream, but at least the shock got her eyes to open.

Then the singing abruptly stopped, and suddenly Clawhauser was standing in her bedroom doorway. “Oh, you’re awake.”

She now knew where she was, but the wrong person was greeting her. “What are you doing here?” Judy blurted, the pain causing her to lose all decorum.

“Well, hello to you too,” Clawhauser replied, with a wink.

Judy grimaced. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean- I wasn’t trying to be rude.”

“Oh Judy-loo, I’m just pulling your leg. But maybe I shouldn’t do that, since I’m guessing that little yell you made means you’re not feeling too hot right now.”

Judy nodded, which appeared to be something she could do without alerting any of her pain receptors. But that really wasn’t what concerned her at the moment. “Where’s Nick?” she asked, having a vague recollection of their night in the emergency room and finally coming home to their apartment a little after 3 AM.

“He went into work. I’m looking after you while he’s gone.”

“But he wasn’t supposed to go in today.” They’d requested the weekend off for their anniversary.

Clawhauser shrugged. “He said he had some unfinished work to do down at the precinct. Came knocking on my door around 10 this morning asking if I could look after you.”

“10 in the morning? What time is it now?”

“A little after 2.”

“A little after 2?! I slept the whole morning away?”

“Don’t worry, Nick said you might sleep in late, that you were pretty drugged up when you went to bed last night. And from the looks of it, that’s probably the reason you’re awake now. Those pills finally wore off. Do you need some more? They’re on the counter. Nick laid them all out and said, _Clawhauser make sure Judy gets these_ , like he was so serious. I’ve never seen him like that. But I guess that’s because-”

“Clawhauser,” Judy interrupted, using her good wrist to rub one of her temples. “Those painkillers sound great.”

Her cheerful caretaker made an apologetic face. “Right, on my way,” he said, then dashed out of the door frame, reappearing moments later with a glass of carrot juice and two pills. One pill was a little white circle and the other a large red oval that was hard to swallow. Judy couldn’t remember what drugs they were exactly, but also didn’t care. At that moment her body was screaming from soreness and she was willing to take anything if it meant the pain would go away.

As she forced the pills down, Clawhauser sat on the edge of the bed. He still looked apologetic, but Judy’s investigative instincts suspected it was for something else now. “Hey, Judy,” Clawhauser quietly hedged.

“Yeah?” she replied after finishing the last drop of juice and placing her glass on the nightstand.

“I’m sorry that I spoiled Nick’s proposal plans.” Clawhauser had taken to staring at his paws, clearly still guilt ridden over his revealing text from the night before.

“Ben,” Judy said his name softly and he glanced up at her. “I already accepted your apology last night, after I called, remember? You don’t need to say it again.”

“I know, but-”

“No buts, okay? As long as Nick doesn’t know that I know, then it’s not a problem. I’ll figure the rest out later.” Judy paused, her voice turning serious. “He doesn’t know does he?”

Clawhauser shook his head. “No, I’d never-”

Judy’s eyes narrowed.

“Well, maybe I would. But trust me, after I blew his cover I felt horrible. I’m not taking any chances. From now on Benjamin Clawhauser is not saying a single word about proposals or weddings. I’ll even stop watching _Say Yes to the Dress_. Although, I will DVR the upcoming episode featuring Katy Purry. She’s getting married, you know. It’s advertised as a supersized special episode where Katy looks for her dress. But I’m not watching it. Nope. Not until this whole thing with you and Nick sorts out.”

Judy was impressed. If Clawhauser was willing to give up one of his shows then that meant he was taking this seriously. “Good, because Nick is already depressed enough about what happened last night. I can’t even get him to talk to me about it. He’s just bottling everything up inside.”

“He did seem to be wearing his grumpy pants this morning,” Clawhauser observed. “How long do you think it’ll take him to come around?”

The question made Judy frown. “I don’t know. I’ve never seen him so … upset. He’s gone through phases before, shutting me out and being secretive about his past. But this is different. _He’s_ different. He’s not angry or frustrated, he’s ... hopeless, and I can’t reach him.” The tears began spilling over before she was even aware they’d welled in her eyes, and instantly Clawhauser was at her side.

“Oh, don’t worry so much, Judy,” he comforted, his voice an octave lower than his usual high pitched squeal. “It’ll work out. You’re Nick and Judy. You always come through in the end. You’re the best team there is.”

Judy didn’t answer. She felt downright awful, physically and emotionally. So much had gone wrong, because she’d decided to take on that jerk rhino instead of leaving with Nick like he wanted. Her sense of justice and love for Nick had overlapped to create a false sense of invincibility. And it had ruined not only her body, but Nick’s spirit. He wasn’t to blame. She was. Why couldn’t he see that?

“Hey, you know what you need?” Clawhauser said, returning back to his regularly animated self. “A good romantic comedy. How ‘bout _When Hare met Bunny_? It’s your favorite.” He did a little jazz paws gesture to help sell his movie idea.

But Judy sighed and shook her head at the suggestion, not feeling up for a movie that had such a strong connection back to Nick. “W-what about … _Sleepless in Snarlattle_?” she suggested, sniffing and then rubbing her good paw against her nose.

“Oh yeah, that’s a good one. I’ll go put the DVD in.” Clawhauser walked away and was almost to the door, but came back to lean Judy’s crutches against the bed. “Can’t forget these bad boys,” he said.

“Aw, not those things,” Judy groaned, remembering her ankle splint hidden under the bed covers. She also had a wrist splint, but had taken it off in an attempt to show Nick his reaction to her injuries was disproportionate to the reality of her situation. The tactic hadn’t worked.

“Well, I could just pick you up and take you to the couch,” Clawhauser suggested, causing Judy to flick her eyes away from the crutches and back up to him. “It’d be like carrying you over the threshold.” He giggled at his joke, but grew quiet seconds later when realization hit him. “Oh, I’m sorry. I mentioned something about weddings, didn’t I? I’m the worst.”

But Judy shrugged, deciding to overlook his flub. “You know, I think we can make this a crutch-less experience by just watching the movie in here on my laptop.”

“Oh, right! Duh!” Clawhauser dramatically hit his forehead with his paw and rolled his eyes. “You know, we can make this like a slumber party. I’ll pop us some popcorn and when the movie’s over we can talk about our celebrity crushes.”

Judy’s stomach rumbled at the mention of food and she smiled. “That sounds like a great idea.”

Clawhauser gave squeal of delight, and then raced from the room.

Yet, even if she no longer needed the crutches to leave her room, Judy couldn’t get around not using them to take a trip to the bathroom. So while Clawhauser occupied himself with getting things ready for their _party_ , Judy strapped on her wrist splint, grasped her crutches, and tried maneuvering across the bedroom towards the bathroom on the other side. It wasn’t easy, and after a few fumbles, she couldn't stop a small feeling of resentment from momentarily taking up space in her heart. If Nick had been there, it would have been much less challenging. Of course, Judy could’ve asked Clawhauser for help … if the idea of him taking care of her in the bathroom wasn’t mortifying.

But ever the resilient bunny, Judy managed to tackle the bathroom issue alone, and when Clawhauser came back into the room- hugging a bowl of popcorn to his chest with one arm, and carrying her laptop in the other- Judy thought that maybe for a moment, as she watched a movie with her friend, she’d be able to quiet the nagging feeling that her currently absent boyfriend was slowly beginning to pull himself away from her.

* * *

 

Nick looked down at his phone. A text from Judy stared back.

“Who’s that?” Finnick asked, and Nick shoved his phone back in his pocket.

“No one,” he replied, shifting his gaze back to his friend sitting across from him at the foldout table Finnick had set up near his van.

“Bullshit. The only mammal who ever texts you when you’re here is Judy, and it’s usually her telling you to get your ass home.”

“Judy doesn’t know I’m here. She thinks I’m at work.”

“Why?”

“Well, I _was_ at work, but left.”

“So why didn’t you go home?”

Nick folded his arms across his chest and leaned back in his chair. “It’s complicated.”

“Ohhh.” Finnick nodded his head like he understood, and then hopped into his van, emerging seconds later with a beer for Nick. He slid it across the table and Nick caught it in his paw.

“This is warm,” he complained.

“I ran out of ice for the cooler this morning. Beggars can’t be choosers. You should know that.” Finnick laughed again.

“I shouldn’t drink. If I come back smelling like alcohol she’ll know I stopped by here.” Nick slid the beer back to Finnick, who shook his head.

“Look, I’m gonna tell you what I did the last time you were here for one of your issues with that bunny. I don’t agree with her on most things, but when it comes to you, there’s no question. She’s the only mammal that makes you happy. So whatever it is, get over it. You’re made for each other. Life goes on. And all that other stuff you say to get someone to stop being an idiot.”

“Oh, you’re so inspiring,” Nick deadpanned, but then grumbled, “I didn’t come here for a pep talk. I just wanna- I wanna ignore reality for a little bit. Can we play cards or something?”

Finnick shook his head and let out a loud laugh. “No way. We both cheat.”

“Well, it’s not cheating if we’re on the same playing field.”

Finnick nodded, and replied, “Good point.” Then he went into his van again, coming back out with a deck of cards for them to use.

As Finnick began shuffling, Nick pulled out his phone again, and wrote a response to Judy’s text asking him when he’d be home. _Still working. Will be back around 5. I’ll pick us up takeout. Tell Ben thanks for staying._

* * *

Thanks to [PullTogether ](http://archiveofourown.org/users/PullTogether/pseuds/PullTogether)for beta-ing this chapter. And if you get the chance, check out his fics (especially 'Burdens of the Son'- it's one of my favs!)

 


	6. Chapter 6

Judy felt absolutely hideous those first few days out of the hospital. Yes, the physical injuries were constantly reminding her of their existence, but it was Nick who took the bad to worse. Gone was the frowning and sulking Nick from the hospital. His mood had devolved into not a mood at all. He was withdrawn and expressionless. And the topic of what happened was now off limits thanks to her ill-advised attempt to nudge Nick into opening up one evening while they suffered through yet another dinner of takeout in silence.

“Nick, please talk to me,” Judy softly begged, sending him a pleading look from across their tiny kitchen table.

“About what?” Nick wore his mask of indifference as he replied.

“Tell me that you won’t let what happened force a wedge between us. That you forgive me and we can move on.” Once the words were out of her mouth, she wanted to rescind them immediately, remembering how badly he reacted to her apology in the hospital. Nick’s face momentarily flickered an emotion other than apathy, but Judy got to him before that emotion spilled out of his mouth. “That we can forgive each other,” she amended, improvising through a different strategy she thought might speak to his sensible side. “We both made a manageable situation worse. We’re officers of the law, and should have remembered our training. De-escalation was the key. I should have never approached him and you should have just walked away when he started taking pictures of us. We both let our emotions for each other play into our decisions and that was wrong.”

There, she had put the blame on them both. They were equals. Always. Even in the bad.

A tense silence followed, making the air feel so stifling and thick that Judy imagined she was drowning in carrot soup. Losing her nerve, she focused on the little carrot design of the table cloth, remembering when Nick had bought it for her. “Some carrots for my Carrots to eat her carrots on,” he’d joked, and of course, she’d laughed. Judy missed that playful side of him. That was the fox she’d fallen in love with, and also the fox that had been absent ever since the concert incident.

When Nick began speaking moments later, she glanced back up, but his response fell far from the mark of what she’d been aiming to pull from him. “If it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t have been in that situation in the first place.” His words were deliberate, each syllable enunciated. “If you’d gone to that concert with another rabbit, no one would’ve looked twice.”

“After you, Clawhauser is my best friend. A friend who also happens to be a predator. If I hadn’t gone with you, I would have gone with him,” Judy countered. “Am I supposed to stop hanging around Clawhauser too, because others might judge us?”

“But you aren’t dating Clawhauser.”

“Well, of course not. He’s not you.”

Nick was quiet for a minute as he dug into his chow mein noodles with his chop-sticks. He wasn’t eating them, just moving them around as a distraction. “Judy, we can’t even have kits,” he finally stated, his voice grave like some doctor coming in holding his clipboard, telling a patient they only had a month left to live.

The sharp detour in topic, stunned Judy into a brief silence. “Where did that even come from?” she asked once her voice returned. “I’m not- it’s not something we’ve ever talked about before. Do you even know if I want kits? You’ve never asked me.”

“Well, it’s not something I ever thought of before it was thrown in my face how different we are.” He was now attacking his noodles, taking out his frustration on his food before shoving the box away.

Judy shook her head in disbelief at his sudden obsession with their differences, enough to bring up their inability to have kits. “Nick, I’m far too busy to even think about something like that. All I’m focused on is my job, you, and my family back in Bunnyburrow. For me that’s enough. But if you want more than that … well, there are ways around our _differences_.” She paused to drag in a breath, wanting to steady her voice and put back together the pieces of what used to be a very confident bunny.

Judy wasn’t herself.

Nick wasn’t himself.

“Why can’t we just go back normal? One incident of intolerance shouldn’t define us. Our love is so much bigger than that.”

“But what’s normal? Us overreacting, because we have to deal with intolerance? You said so yourself, we let our emotions for each other get in the way of good decisions,” Nick replied.

“I didn’t say that, so you could use it against me,” Judy said, her voice breaking. It was enough to make Nick back down, but not in the _you’re right, I’m wrong_ way. He was reverting back to his emotionless fox form and Judy felt a strangled cry catch in her throat at the sight of losing him back to this thing that wasn’t recognizable as the Nick she loved. “Nick, please. You promised me, remember? You promised you would never stop trying to make me happy.”

“And believe me, I want to keep that promise, but maybe my way of going about it isn’t the right way. Maybe you’d be happier without all my fox baggage attached to you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Judy spoke in a barely audible whisper, too afraid to look at Nick and see the zombie he’d become staring back.

“It means …” he let his words fall away into a heavy sigh. “It means I don’t want to talk about this anymore. At all. Please, don’t bring it up again,” he stoically said, and then threw his pulverized noodles into the trash.

After that, Judy was no longer worried that Nick wouldn’t follow through with his plan to propose. At that point, she wasn’t even sure her boyfriend still wanted to be together. It was a fear she took to her mom later that night after Nick had gone to run some errands … whatever that meant. Judy sure as fluff knew it wasn’t for a trip to the market. They’d been eating takeout since she’d become incapable of cooking.

“What’s wrong Bun Bun?” her mom asked, instantly seeing that her daughter had been crying. “Are you in pain? You know my offer to come take care of you is still on the table. I know you like to think you can do it all, but everyone has their limits. Even you. Just say the word and I’ll be there tomorrow.”

“It’s not my body that hurts,” Judy replied, but then with a groan admitted, “Well, actually it does, but that’s not the problem.”

“Oh?” her mom inquired, swiftly turning around to shush a whining kit in the background.

“It’s Nick.” Judy exhaled a sigh of defeat. She was about to do something that was never easy for her … asking for help. “And I was ... I guess I _have_ reached my limit. I want to take you up on your offer. I need you. I need my mom here with me.”

* * *

 

Nick had just come back from patrolling with Officer Wolford when Clawhauser called him over to his desk. “Bogo wants to see you in his office,” he stated, and Wolford gave his temporary partner a wide eyed expression, non-verbally communicating the question- _what did you do this time_? Nick ignored him.

“Do you know what it’s about?” he asked Clawhauser, but the cheetah only shrugged.

Usually Clawhauser would’ve thrown out a couple of his off the wall speculations as to why Bogo wanted to talk to him (none of which would have resembled anything based in reality) but the mood between the two friends had cooled since Judy’s accident. Nick knew he was the reason why, but wasn’t willing to fix it. His explanation would shoot straight over Clawhauser’s head anyway. No one in his inner-circle knew what it was like to love someone, but also be aware that you weren’t good for them, and yet still not be brave enough to let that mammal go and be happy with someone else.

Nick wanted to protect Judy, but was too selfish to follow through, and being around Clawhauser only complicated matters. He couldn’t let the biggest fan of _The Nick and Judy reality show_ know that it might soon be cancelled. Clawhauser would try his hardest to keep that from happening, and Nick was susceptible to his influence. He couldn’t chance being swayed into making the wrong decision, so Clawhauser had been given the cold shoulder. One day, when Nick’s whole thing with Judy was sorted out, he’d apologize to Clawhauser and bring him in a dozen donuts with extra sprinkles.

But for now, Nick continued his cold shoulder scam with a brushoff of Clawhauser, and headed towards Bogo’s office, knocking on the door once he got there. A gruff voice on the other side answered for him to enter, and then the owner of that oh so cheery bass greeted Nick with an emotionless, “Officer Wilde,” from behind his desk.

“You wanted to see me, sir?”

“Right. Close the door and sit.” Nick did as he was told, and Bogo set the papers he’d been shuffling down on his desk, followed by his reading glasses. “So, still no change in Officer Hopps decision to not press charges?” Bogo asked.

Bogo hadn’t been happy with Judy on this issue, but she’d been stubborn about not dragging her assault out with court appearances. Plus there was that whole martyr syndrome of hers where she always took the blame for everything. “No, sir. Not that I’m aware of,” Nick replied, shaking his head.

Chief Bogo’s ever present frown deepened. “Well, I suppose you’ll be wanting to take a week off as well to stay with her in Bunnyburrow.”

“Excuse me?” Nick felt like there was a part of Bogo's sentence missing. 

“Just so you know, I don’t usually make exceptions for my officers to take leave so suddenly when they are not the ones injured, and since you and Officer Hopps are not legally married, there is no family leave available to you. Still, I’m not heartless. We all like Officer Hopps around here and want what’s best for her. If she needs to be home for a week to help her heal, then you have my permission to use your vacation time to go with her.”

“Uh, sir, I’m a little confused-”

“Don’t question it, Wilde, or I might just take back my offer. Now get out of my office.” Bogo went back to his papers and acted like Nick didn’t exist.

“Okaaayy,” Nick muttered under his breath as he stood and then walked from the room.

If Judy was planning on going to Bunnyburrow then that was news to him. Although, they hadn’t exactly been talking much lately due to his mental back and forth over how to handle their relationship. Mostly he was escaping to Finnick's. It was much easier doing that than wrestling with his conscious or seeing Judy in her current fragile state.

Nick went to send his girlfriend a text to try and figure out what the hell was going on, but put his phone back into his pocket after only writing few words. This deserved a face to face conversation. He’d wait until quitting time, which was only two hours away. And then, Nick found himself absently reaching into his other pocket to grasp the ring that he still kept there. It was something he hadn’t felt compelled to do since putting it away on the night of the shunted proposal, and it caused a funny feeling to swirl in his gut. But Nick overlooked the sensation for what it really was, and released the ring. “Too many tacos for lunch,” he mumbled to no one in particular and then went to his locker to find some antacids.

Unfortunately for Nick, when he returned home that evening to discuss this sudden trip to Bunnyburrow Judy was taking, it wasn’t his girlfriend that greeted him, but Mrs. H instead. And she didn’t seem to be all that happy with Nick either.


	7. Chapter 7

Before actually meeting her, Nick visualized Judy’s mom as a constantly overwhelmed rabbit on the verge of losing it. How else could life be when you had kits taking up every inch and corner of it? Not that he had any experience in that area. He’d been an only kit. But it made sense in his head that too many kits equaled one crazy mama.

So when Nick finally did get the chance to know Judy’s mom beyond just a quick chat through the phone, he was surprised to learn his image of an overly stressed rabbit had been dead wrong. On the contrary, she was usually the voice of calm and reason in tense situations, and over time Nick put together a theory behind the mystery of why Mrs. H was the way she was. She could handle the impossibility of 276 kits with ease, because she’d already _been there, done that_. Each of her kits was unique and brought something different to the table. Where one bunny might like to throw food on the floor, the other may, oh, let’s see … bring a fox home as her boyfriend. But not even that little tidbit had ruffled Bonnie Hopps, because not much fazed her anymore.

In fact, Nick had only seen her upset once in the two years he’d known her. Back when Nick and Judy had lied about living together and the ruse was eventually found out, she’d given them a piece of her mind. It wasn’t so much the shared apartment sans marriage license that bothered her, but that they’d hidden it at all. She’d shamed them both, and Nick couldn’t remember the last time he’d been reprimanded by someone and felt remorse. Not even his own mom had been successful in that area. But guilt was Mrs. Hopps hidden skill, and when she needed to, she knew how to dish it out.

And it was a tactic she successfully employed when Nick opened his apartment door and saw her standing there, paws placed firmly on her hips.

After the initial shock of seeing her wore off, Nick tried to collect himself and greet Judy’s mom with the type of charm he usually shoveled her way. He forced his face into a grin, pointed in her direction, winked, but then struggled through a decidedly charmless, ”Uhhh, hey there, Mrs. Hopps? Nice to, um … see you?”

Not only had his greeting sucked, but it ended with an uptick in pitch, making the words sound like a question. Which they might as well have been, since not only was Judy possibly going to Bunnyburrow, but now her mom was visiting. There were definitely a lot of questions that needed answering. But, with the way he’d let his hello tumble out, Nick worried she might interpret it as him being unsure of how nice it was to see her, and in the back of his head he could hear Judy mocking him with- _slick move, Nick._

“Hello to you, too,” she replied, not seeming angry, but something was noticeably off about the way she spoke.

Nick’s smile slipped into one of unease as he peered around Judy’s mom to look at his girlfriend sitting on the couch just a few feet away. Her eyes refused to meet his questioning stare as she focused on her wrist splint. “So uh, Judy didn’t say anything about you visiting,” Nick said, finally giving up on his attempt to gain Judy’s attention. “When did you get in?”

“About an hour ago. I used my key.” Mrs. H held up the key Nick had given her as a peace offering during the whole _we’re not living together, well actually we are,_ debacle.

“Come visit our apartment anytime you want _,_ ” he’d offered back then. Now it was coming back to bite him on the tail. “Oh, well, glad you could get some use out of it. Surprise visits are always a treat,” he lied.

“Yes, I know my visit is a surprise,” Judy’s mom continued, “but circumstances being what they are, I had to come.”

“What they are? You mean Judy’s ...” Nick couldn’t bring himself to mention the incident, so he gestured to Judy who still had her eyes focused away from him.

“Not so much that. You know Judy, always so independent. Back when I first offered to come stay, she was very insistent that she could handle this with just you helping. But I guess that’s not been happening much lately … has it?”

“Beg pardon?” Nick replied, trying to exude calm, even though he sensed things were about to go downhill real fast.

“Takeout for dinner the last five days? Really, Nick? A Bunny cannot live on greasy noodles alone. Especially not a bunny healing from injuries. She needs her greens, not to mention carrots. Lots of them.”

“Well, in my defense, Judy always gets the fried rice. Plenty of carrots and celery in that.” Nick grimaced. Even he knew this was a lame spin on his lack of meal diversity.

Judy’s mom ignored his excuse and plowed right on through to her next gripe. “And what’s with you disappearing every night? Judy needs your help and company. You can’t leave her alone all day while you work and then be home for only an hour before leaving again.”

“Well, I-I’m just … a busy mammal that has … um … well, you know how it goes.”

“No, I’m afraid I don’t.”

Nick was struggling to come up with a better answer for his disappearing act, when Judy suddenly whined, “Mooom.” It was a stern warning tucked into an otherwise quiet plea.

“Judy, I’m sorry. I know I said I wouldn’t say anything, but I’m not going to let this slide,” Mrs. H said to her daughter, while still looking at Nick. Clearly there’d been an earlier conversation between the two that wasn’t supposed to reach Nick’s ears. But Judy’s mom was in full protective mode now and couldn’t be bothered to keep that promise. “So Nick, do you want to tell me what’s going on?” she asked, fixing him with a pointed stare.

Nick felt his chest tighten. Emotions were bubbling to the surface- ones he’d tried his hardest to shove down into the bottomless pit of things that needed to be forgotten. Desperately wanting to escape them, he ignored the instinct that told him to just let those emotions out, and said, “Hey, I’ve got an idea. I’ll go get some ingredients and maybe you can put together one of your stupendous non-takeout Bonnie Hopps meals. Sound like a plan? Yes? Good.”

Judy’s mom hadn't actually replied. Nick just wanted to streamline the leaving process, which would be his gateway to feeling numb again … at least for a little while. Then turning, he walked out the door, away from Judy, her mom, and the feelings of guilt that were about to overwhelm him.

“Nick, please come back,” he heard Judy call as the door closed, but he had already mentally checked out and didn’t answer.

As it was, his departure had been so abrupt that it didn’t even occur to him that he was still wearing his uniform as he shopped at the local market, grasping any vegetable he’d ever seen Judy use in one of her meals. But when Nick stopped by Finnick’s on the way back, it became very clear he’d worn the wrong thing to visit his friend.

“Hey, you can’t have that shit on when you're here! You’ll ruin my reputation.”

“Huh?” Nick said, glancing down at his outfit.

“That!” Finnick hopped onto his plastic table and prodded Nick’s shiny gold badge a few times. “We’ve got a deal. You want my help, you and your rabbit don’t come round here looking like you do now.”

“Oh, I didn’t even think ... I just needed to get away.” Nick sank down into one of Finnick’s chairs. He pulled the brown paper bag full of produce against his chest to hide his badge, but that wasn’t good enough for Finnick.

“Nice try, but that bag’s not gonna hide your blues. And anyway, you can’t stay. Jason’s coming over.”

“Jason?”

“Yeah, the fox who replaced you. You’ve met him. He’s uses aliases a lot. Doesn’t trust anyone. I think he was Michael when you were here before. But you weren’t dressed like that, so you gotta get outta here. He thinks you're one of us.”

Nick sighed. “It’s just Judy’s mom is visiting and she started guilting me about how I’ve been ignoring Judy,” he mournfully explained as if Finnick had asked what was wrong.

“Good,” his friend blurted out, and Nick’s eyes turned into slits.

“Gee thanks. Glad to see you got my back,” he caustically replied.

Finnick hopped down from the table and went into his van, returning seconds later wearing his elephant costume. “Look, we’ve been over this before,” he said, after spitting his pacifier into his paw. “Every time you come here I tell you the same damn thing. You’re like a sad annoying kit who hasn’t learned his lesson, so he keeps crying to mommy. Hey, maybe I should just give you this,” he jumped back on the table and waved the pacifier in Nick’s face who brushed it aside with a frown. “If she’s too good for you, don’t leave her. Suck it up and try to be good enough for her. You’re already in too deep. You might as well go all in and marry her.”

Nick didn’t say anything, just hugged the bag of groceries tighter.

“What? You’re not gonna give me that line on how you can’t make the effort, because you can’t improve on being a fox, or have you finally moved on from that self-hating species shit?”

Nick shot Finnick a dirty look.

“Hey, love hurts sometimes. It’s gonna hurt with Judy, and it’s gonna hurt with me. This is your tough love wake up call from your elephant son. Time to grow up, Dad. Go back to Mom and propose.” Finnick laughed and left the table to peer around the corner of the alleyway where he always set up shop. “Jason’s almost here, so get your tail outta my space,” he ordered, all humor gone from his voice.

Still grasping his groceries, Nick stood. “Thanks for the advice … son,” he said, before heading in the opposite direction Finnick’s new partner in scams was coming from. He’d meant for his thanks to be sarcastic, but for some reason it had come out sounding perfectly sincere.

When Nick returned home- an hour after originally leaving- he found Mrs. H sitting in the spot Judy had been occupying earlier, with his girlfriend was nowhere to be seen. “Where’s Judy?” Nick asked, setting his bag of vegetables down on the table.

“She went to bed,” Judy’s mom answered, closing the book in her lap and setting it aside.

“This early?” Nick glanced at the clock above the stove, and saw that the little carrots representing hands were pointing to the 7 and 12.

“She said she wasn’t hungry. Plus we’re leaving early in the morning.”

Nick didn’t have to ask where, but still found himself saying, “To Bunnyburrow?”

She nodded. “For the next week. Judy needs to be with her family right now after what happened,” Mrs. H replied as she stood and then moved over to Nick’s bag of food, letting out a soft chuckle after looking inside. “Hmmm, seems like you brought back every variety of vegetable with you.”

Nick shrugged. “Heh, yeah, well, Judy’s usually the one who puts all this stuff together. I’m just around to cheer her on while she works her culinary magic and turns it into a meal. I had to do a lot guessing at the store and just ended up getting one of everything.”

Judy’s mom laid all the bag’s contents out on the table, leaving no surface of it vegetable free. “I think I can fix us something with all this,” she surmised and then glancing up at Nick, asked, “Want to cheer me on?”

It wasn’t until she laughed, that Nick understood her question was a joke, and then he attempted to play along by asking, “Mind if I sit down while I do it? Don’t wanna exert myself too much. It’s a tough job being a cheerleader.” He exaggerated a groan as he sat down in one of the table chairs.

Judy’s mom smiled and replied, “Sure.” Then walking over to the cupboards, she pulled out a large pot and went about fixing a meal for them both.

As Nick watched her move around the kitchen, he struggled to understand why the awkwardness he’d expected to greet him at the door, wasn’t anywhere to be found. His interaction with Judy’s mom had gone back to what was typical for them, almost as if the last five days had been a bad dream. Nick’s cynical side thought maybe it was all to lead him into a false sense of security before she attacked again, but he’d also had enough of listening to the negative part of his personality. That cynicism had been given too large of a role in making his decisions lately, and Nick missed looking at life through the eyes of an optimist like Judy. He was never very good at that and counted on her encouragement to see things beyond the bad.

Then there was Finnick’s rude yet honest take on everything, still looping inside his brain. Finnick never lied to spare a mammal’s feelings; he always told everyone exactly what he thought. And if another cynical fox could see a future for him and Judy, then Nick thought maybe he’d been approaching everything all wrong.

Altogether it was making it difficult for him to fall back into his emotionless state. But for the first time in days, Nick thought that maybe this wasn’t such a bad thing, and by the time Mrs. H placed a bowl of vegetable stew in front of him, enough of his emotions had escaped from his bottomless pit that Nick thought maybe he’d spill his guts if given the opportunity.

But strangely enough it was Judy’s mom who got to the whole spilling guts things first by sitting down with Nick to eat her stew and asking, “Did I ever tell you about the time I met Judy’s father?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A chapter that ends on a positive note for once :)


	8. Chapter 8

The most Nick knew about Judy’s parents’ life before they settled down as carrot farmers and had (in his opinion) one too many kits, was that they’d been high school sweethearts and married young. So, when he answered Mrs. H’s question it was with a truthful, “You haven’t told me how you met Stu, but I know the basics from Judy. That it was during school.”

Judy’s mom nodded slowly, took a bite of her food, and after clearing her throat, said, “When I met Stu we were both young and dumb. I don’t mean that in the sense that we were actually dumb. I was at the top of my class and Stu was … well, not a straight A student. But he was good at sports, and funny.”

Judy’s mom hesitated; a faraway look flashed in her eyes and a tiny grin formed on her face. But whatever memory was playing in her mind soon passed and she went back to her story.  

“And it wasn’t exactly necessary that Stu be an overachiever like me, because his family was one of the better known carrot farmers in Bunnyburrow. He always had a career in farming to fall back on if his dream of being a soccer star didn’t work out. Bunnies love to play soccer. Our extremely strong legs are great at kicking.”

Nick was reminded of another bunny who’d told him this recently, and he had to force the memory of a broken Judy laying on a hospital bed from his mind.

“That was Stu, the soccer playing jock. And me, the studious, soon-to-be valedictorian. We were complete opposites that somehow managed to fall in love, and oh boy, did we ever fall in love fast. Now here’s where the dumb part comes in.”

She took a few bites of her stew, before continuing, like a storyteller pausing for dramatic effect. And it worked. Nick found that he was oddly anxious to find out where Judy’s mom was going with her tale.

“We were dumb enough in love to not look out for our futures. With my grades, I could’ve been one of the few bunnies from our school to go off to college. That’s what I planned anyway. And Stu … well, don’t tell him I said this, but he probably would’ve become a carrot farmer anyway. Oh, he was good at soccer, but better at farming. It’s in his family’s blood. Still, he did have that dream of playing sports professionally. But none of that mattered when a few days after we graduated I found out I was going to have kits, which ended up being just one kit when all was said and done. Stu was the father, of course. Like a cliché from a movie, we’d done it after prom.”

Judy’s mom shook her head, and Nick averted his gaze down to the floating potato pieces in his stew as embarrassment suddenly took hold. Was he really having this conversation with his girlfriend’s mom? _Why is she telling me this_ , he wondered while shoveling a mouthful of broth and mushy vegetables into his mouth. Did Judy even have this information about her parents?

“I kept it a secret from Judy until last year,” Mrs. H interrupted his thoughts, almost like she’d been reading them. “I never wanted her to think she was the reason I settled for a life in Bunnyburrow. I love all my kits, and adore being their mom. Which I guess is obvious, considering I ended up having 275 kits after Judy. With all _those_ pregnancies being planned.” She emphasized this with a wink and Nick smiled uneasily. “The point is, I was able to find happiness in my circumstances, but I sometimes wonder what following my dreams would’ve ended up being like instead of just settling for a simple farming life with Stu.” Then Judy’s mom surprised Nick by reaching across the table and patting his paw. “But _you_ don’t have to settle. Not like I did.”

Nick swallowed his mouthful of stew, and pulled his paw away, clasping it with the other one under the table. “I don’t know what you mean. What does that story have to do with me?”

“Leaving Judy, because you think it would be best for her, is settling for a life you don’t actually want for yourself.”

Nick tensed. “I never said I was leaving Judy.” His voice was defensive, but he managed to calm it down a notch when he continued by asking, “Who told you that?” The only mammal he’d opened up to was Finnick, and Nick highly doubted his con artist friend and Judy’s mom had connected during the week to discuss his issues.

Mrs. H’s mouth quirked up on one side. “No one told me. I’m a mom. You don’t think it wasn’t the first thing I guessed after Judy told me what’s been going on between you two? Mother’s intuition just knows, even when it’s not concerning her own kit. Although, I do hope you would consider me a mother figure of sorts.”

Nick’s ears drooped as he sighed heavily, realizing there wasn't any point in trying to convince Judy’s mom she was wrong. He wasn’t the lying type anymore. Sure, he’d avoid telling the truth by evading it, but outright making up stories was a personality trait of his old life. “Don’t tell Judy, please. I don’t want to hurt her.”

“But leaving won’t hurt her?” she asked, a brow raising. Her expression displayed motherly love, but there was a slight defiance in her eyes that played against it, and Nick felt like a kit being scolded.

“I know it’ll hurt, but she’ll get over me. She’ll move on.” Nick had to stop talking and swallowed hard to stop himself from choking on the idea of living his life without Judy. It’s why he hadn’t been able to go through with it. Just the thought of cutting her out was too painful. He couldn’t imagine how awful actually doing it would be. “Every time I look at her, it makes me think about what happened and why it happened … because of _me_ ,” he admitted. His voice wavered near the end, and trying to hide this, Nick coughed into his paw.

Mrs. H’s look turned sympathetic. “I admit, I don’t know anything about what it’s like to date someone of a different species, but I do know that Judy loves you. I see it in the way she looks at you, and the way she talks about you. Judy has always been an extremely focused kit when it comes to what she wants. She wanted to become a police officer, and that’s what she did. She wanted to date you, and that’s what she did. Judy’s not one to give up so easily on something when it gets difficult. Are you really going to give up on _her_ so easily?” She paused and looked at her half eaten stew. “Well, I’ve chatted your ear off enough about this for one night, don’t you think?” she commented while rising from her seat. “My stews gone cold. Better go reheat it.”

After that, the topic of Nick and Judy fell to the wayside as Mrs. H gently steered their conversation into more everyday topics. Mostly she just talked about Bunnyburrow and all the things her kits were up to. And one thing Nick was surprised to learn was that Annie had started ballet. “She told me to tell her Uncle Nick- and these are her exact words- that you better be there for my first show or I’ll make you watch _Wrangled_ for the hundredth time.”

Nick chuckled not only at what Judy’s little sister had said, but at the idea of the rambunctious Annie (who’d been splashing in a toilet the first time he saw her) doing something as graceful as ballet. But it was also a reminder of just how connected he was to Judy’s family, that one of them would want him at an important event.

Beside one grumpy Grandpop, the Hopps family all got along with Nick just fine despite him being a fox, and breaking up with Judy wouldn’t just disrupt her life, but theirs as well. It was another little voice alongside Finnick and Mrs. H, telling him that leaving Judy wasn’t worth it. “Tell Annie that her Uncle Nick promises to be there,” he replied, unwilling to ever disappoint his biggest fan. “Just let me know the date. I’ll be the one in the front row, ready to give her a rose when she finishes.”

“Annie will be happy to hear that,” Judy’s mom said, sounding extremely pleased.

As the evening progressed, their conversation slowly dwindled, until sometime around nine, when Nick yawned and stood. “Well, I’ve got to be up early for work, and I guess to see Judy off too.”

Mrs. H nodded and then scooped up their dirty dishes. “I better wash these,” she mentioned, and then placed them into the sink. “Goodnight, Nick,” she said glancing over her shoulder.

He repeated the phrase back and made it over to the bedroom door before pausing with his paw on the door handle. Swallowing the lump that had suddenly appeared in his throat, Nick turned around to face her again and quietly said, "Thank you, Bonnie.” Judy’s mom twisted her head back in his direction and smiled. "You know, I’m sure Judy’s told you this already, but my mom died when I was 18," he continued, deciding that since she’d shared a window into her past then he could too. “It was hard on me to lose her, so it’s nice that you say I can call you mom. Honestly, I sometimes need a mom around to smack some sense into me. Hard headed.” Nick rapped his fist against his skull a few times.

Nick didn’t think it was much of a thank you, but Judy’s mom did. She looked physically overcome and placed a paw over her heart. “Oh, you go ahead and call me mom anytime you like. I have over two hundred kits. What’s one more?” Then she giggled and the emotional moment between them transitioned into humor.

“Well, goodnight, _Mom_.” Nick winked, then opened his bedroom door and walked inside.

The room was quiet, except for the soft snores coming from the bed. It was a sound Nick had grown accustomed to hearing from Judy ever since they moved in together. She was a snorer, but it wasn’t that bad, just a thick intake of breath every now and then. He could easily sleep through it on most nights. But tonight was different. After quietly changing his clothes and laying down beside Judy, the noise coming from her felt amplified by his indecision over what to do about their relationship.

Nick couldn’t sleep, and through this insomnia, he found himself reaching out to Judy. She was laying on her side with her back to him, when his paw found the curve of her hip and rested there. The soft cadence of her snores stopped abruptly, and a few seconds later her body shifted around to face him. It was dark, but he could see her expression, confused and sad. Nick could hardly stand it, and moving his paw up to caress the side of her face, he whispered, “Carrots.”

Then it felt like a hole was being ripped in his chest, causing all those emotions he’d been suppressing to come pouring out. And once that stream started, he couldn’t dam it back up. In the end this was a good thing though, because even if he’d let Judy into so many areas of his heart- opening up to her like he hadn’t done with anyone else- there was still one area of vulnerability he kept from her. But not anymore.

And so there in their bedroom, Nick showed Judy a side of him he never had before. He wept.


	9. Chapter 9

When his touch stirred her awake, Judy’s first instinct was to stay turned away from Nick. She didn’t think her heart could take anything he might say. If the last few days were any indication of why he’d woken her, then she could only see one outcome.

He was going to call it quits. Judy had been anticipating him giving her the break up speech ever since the fight that had prompted her phone call home, and after he’d run the other way when confronted by her mom, it just made sense that the next step would be saying goodbye.

But then, as Nick’s paw stayed motionless on her hip, Judy changed her mind. She wouldn’t ignore her problem until it became an infected sore. Nick wasn’t a problem; being without him was. But even so, the Judy Hopps she knew took charge of her life, and if Nick wanted to break up, she would go down fighting. And in the end, even if it didn’t do a lick of good, Judy would know that she’d made a final effort to keep them together.

Nick Wilde. Her first boyfriend. Her first breakup.

Judy steeled herself for the impact of his rejection- which she assumed would feel far worse than any pain inflicted by her rhino attacker- before slowly turning to face Nick. But when she finally looked at him, he wasn’t the emotionless zombie she’d been expecting. Instead, Nick was a mirror of her own sadness. Her mind quickly went to modify her strategy- this was going to be a sad goodbye, not a fight- but then Judy's thoughts fell away momentarily as his paw traveled from her hip, up over her arm and shoulder, to cup the side of her face. “Carrots,” he breathed like a caress, and Judy froze. Something was different.

Zombie Nick didn’t call her _Carrots_. Zombie Nick just mumbled her given name. Before the Gazelle concert, whenever Nick referred to her as Judy, it was a sign things were about to get serious- like maybe an _I love you_ , was soon coming. But after her injuries, Nick used the name Judy as a wall. To anyone she ever met, her name was either Judy, or Officer Hopps. To Nick, she’d always been Carrots. But he’d refrained from using that particular nickname in an attempt to distance himself from her. Now Nick was saying it again, and Judy felt a fluttering sensation in her heart … hope.

She opened her mouth to say his name back, but was stunned into silence when Nick suddenly began crying. It happened so quickly, that Judy was thrown off balance, but when he tried to hide his emotional breakdown by shoving his snout and eyes into his paws, she came back to her senses. He shouldn’t feel shame for crying, and wanting to show Nick this, she used the gentle touch of her good paw to uncover his face. “Don’t hide from me. I’m right here,” Judy whispered. “I’m here for you.”

Nick's tears continued spilling over, and some were clinging to his orange fur as he sobbed, “I’m sorry.”

Judy moved in closer and leaned into his chest. She wasn’t sure what else to do, because this was new territory for her. Nick had never cried in front of Judy before. She’d seen him misty eyed several times- usually when talking about his mom- but he hadn’t ever sobbed like he was now, and being let into this part of who he was at last, was an overwhelming experience. As was her intense need to comfort him.

After a few minutes of feeling his chest heave and fall from the gasps that followed each sob, Nick began to quiet down enough that Judy heard his heartbeat thumping. It was a reminder that he was made of fur and blood, just like her. Not a zombie, but her Nick, the fox she’d fallen in love with. Was he finally back? Judy decided to test the waters.

“Nick,” she said, speaking into his chest, “I wish I could make it easy to love me. I wish that what we have together wasn’t a strange anomaly that not everyone can understand. I wish-”

“Judy, please stop.”

He was using her name again, and the flicker of hope inside her heart sputtered, forcing Judy to swallow a lump that caught in her throat. “Why?” she asked, tilting her head upward, so that the underside of his muzzle was visible.

Nick sighed heavily, and then placing his paws on either side of Judy’s waist, he pulled her upward until they were face to face. “You don’t need to say any of those things when I’m the reason we are where we are right now.”

He paused to clear his throat, his voice weak from crying, and Judy waited with baited breath for him to continue. Was this the start to them actually dealing with what happened?

“This is all my fault. I caused this.”

Judy opened her mouth to challenge him, but Nick must have noticed the fire in her eyes, because his voice rose to speak over hers. “ _Not_ because I’m a fox, but because I was too absorbed in my own self-hate, while trying to play it off like I was being selfless. I didn’t think I deserved you, so I pushed you away. I tried to scam you into hating me, but really I was just scamming away my own happiness. I’m such a self-sabotaging idiot.”

In what felt like a lifetime ago, pre-concert Judy most likely would’ve played off of Nick calling himself an idiot with some loving tease. But now, her heart twisted at the sound of grief in his voice. She didn’t want him to be sad. “You could never push me away. No matter what you do, I’ve already seen you at your best, Nick Wilde. I know that fox is still in there, and I’ll always fight for him.” Judy reached over and mimicked the movement he’d done to her earlier by caressing the side of his face. “I’ll always fight for _us_.”

Judy watched as a flash of relief passed over his face, and nervously she moved her mouth over to kiss the side of his neck. She heard a sharp intake of breath, but Nick didn’t push her away. Then as Judy continued to kiss him, trailing her mouth upward until she found the front of his snout, he slowly released that breath in a soft sigh.

But when she pulled away, Nick remained silent and stared at her with an expression Judy couldn’t place. “What’s the matter?” she asked while trying to push down a tremble of fear. It was an unnecessary emotion, at least after his confession. But considering everything that had happened between them in the past few days, she felt conditioned to expect the worst.

“What? Are you afraid I didn’t like what you just did?” Nick tapped Judy’s nose, which must have been twitching. He was a breath away from a chuckle, and a little bit of her anxiety washed away. If her boyfriend was teasing, then that was a return to normalcy.

“No, it’s not that,” Judy replied, repositioning herself so she was sitting, and Nick matched her movements until he was in front of her. “You just seem distant. I thought maybe after what you said, that … we were turning a corner on this whole mess.”

Nick glanced down at her arm with the wrist splint, and then gently cradled it in his paws. “I was just thinking that- how is it possible this wonderful rabbit I don’t deserve, was able to so easily forgive how stupid I’ve been. I wasn’t there to support you when you needed me the most. Someone hurt you and I only made things worse. It kills me that I added to your pain, just as much as it killed me when I blamed myself for what happened.”

“But you’re learning,” Judy reassured him. “We both are, actually. We stumble, but get up again, and learn from it. We keep trying, no matter what obstacles we face, because we love each other. And that love is bigger than any ignorant jerk we meet out there, who probably doesn’t even know what the word love means. But, I do, because I met you.”

The sad look Nick wore shifted into an apologetic smile. “Oh, I think you might know a few other words, because of me. Jerk. Asshole. Moron. Fool. Bonehead. Dummy … you know, you can stop me anytime you like.”

“Oh, no, I’m rather enjoying this. Go on.” Judy softly laughed, and the sensation of being able to find humor in situations again, was freeing. “How about I add one. Stupid McStupid face.”

“I guess I deserve that.” Nick rubbed the back of his neck.

“Well, I’m pretty sure I can live with all those words as long as _love_ is in there with them,” Judy replied.  

Nick smiled, and then wound his arms around Judy’s middle, carefully pulling her into his lap while being mindful of her broken ankle. “You deserve an apology from Stupid McStupid face.” He leaned in and nuzzled his snout against the sensitive area where her shoulder met her neck. “I’m sorry. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to fix what I did to you completely. But I sure as hell will try.”

“Well, you could start by kissing me properly,” Judy murmured, running her paw along the length of his muzzle that was still rubbing against her fur.

“Happy to oblige, ma'am,” Nick quipped, and then cradling her face in his paws, he pressed his mouth against hers, giving Judy her first real kiss in days. And that kiss transitioned into another, and another, and before long, he had lowered them both down onto the mattress where they continued to kiss, and touch, and find a path back to what they once were.

And in those kisses and caresses, Judy sensed a promise; one that said maybe, just maybe, they’d be able to get through this painful episode of their relationship and come out stronger for having weathered it.

* * *

 

“Here’s the money. Now please, tell me again what I told you to promise.”

Clawhauser sighed exasperatedly, which annoyed Nick. It wasn’t as if his friend was the grand keeper of secrets. The guy had a real problem with blurting out stuff he was supposed to keep under wraps.

They were standing in the middle of Clawhauser’s apartment. Nick had his suitcase in one paw, and some cash in the other, waiting for the cheetah to recite his promise again before the money could switch paws. “Well?” Nick prompted.

“I promise not to text or call Judy about the plan. I promise to wait until you call me before I buy my train ticket. I promise to … oh, darn! What was that last one?”

Now it was Nick’s turn to sigh in frustration. “Not to spend the money I’m giving you on anything other than a train ticket. Nothing else. Period.”

“Oh, but can’t I use some of it for a pizza tonight? I’m out of food and I don’t wanna go shopping after work.”

Nick rolled his eyes and added a few more bills to the cash he was giving Clawhauser. “Here, now only spend _some_ of that on a pizza.”

His friend smiled widely and took the money.

There was a knock on the door then, and Judy’s mom poked her head inside. “And remember to water Judy’s plants while we’re gone,” Nick said, raising his voice enough for Mrs. H to hear.

Clawhauser winked a little too enthusiastically. “Sure thing, Nickeroo. Watering plants is my favorite.”

“Are you all set, Nick? The taxi is here and Judy’s waiting for you to help her outside.”

“Yeah, we’re just about done here,” Nick answered, and then lowering his voice, he spoke only for Clawhauser’s ears, “If everything goes well, I’ll see you in Bunnyburrow a few days from now.”

“Good luck with your ...” Clawhauser began in his normal talking voice, but changed his tune when he realized Judy’s mom was still in the room. “Your uh, lottery ticket you bought,” he finished.

Nick shook his head and chuckled. “Thanks for being a pal,” he replied, and began walking away, but stopped near the door to turn around and add, “Ya know, Ben, I have a good feeling about my lotto numbers this time around.” Then Nick strode out of the apartment door with Judy’s mom to catch a train to Bunnyburrow.

* * *

I've been writing these stories of Nick and Judy for so long now that I've acquired enough songs of inspiration to warrant a playlist. You can find it [here](http://8tracks.com/pixiestickers/a-different-goal). The songs go in order with what's been written so far.

 


	10. Chapter 10

Judy tried not to stare at the front door for the zillionth time since Nick and her dad had walked out to go pick up farming supplies. Her battle to not do this was constant and she secretly hated that she’d let him go.

Since reconciling with Nick, Judy had tried to fill every moment with him. They’d even been allowed to share a bedroom while visiting this time (something that had been off limits before) because Judy needed help getting around. And since arriving in Bunnyburrow, Nick had constantly been at Judy’s side, helping her and trying his hardest to make up for those five days he’d been a jerk. But when Judy’s dad asked if he could borrow Nick, she didn't have any real reason for him to stay besides not wanting to let him out of her sight. And so, after Nick whispered, “I’ll be back, gotta go bond with your dad over farming,” and kissed her gently goodbye, the door staring had begun- something her sister Annie didn’t care all too much for, since it kept interrupting their game of checkers.

“Judy!”

Annie’s voice stirred Judy from her thoughts and she turned to look at her little sister. “What?”

"Are you gonna play the game anymore? It’s your turn.” Annie pointed at the checkerboard in front of them on the table.

"Sorry, I got distracted."

“By the door again?” Annie rolled her eyes so dramatically that Judy laughed.

“Better not do that again, or your eyeballs will stick to the back of your head and for the rest of your life you’ll only ever be able to see your brains.”

This didn’t appear to be bad news to the six year old who clapped her hands excitedly. “Really?”

“No, not really.” Judy snorted and then played her move.

"Stop worrying ‘bout Nick,” Annie said while watching Judy jump her game piece over two of hers and subsequently win the game. "He’ll come back."

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Judy took Annie’s pieces, grinning triumphantly. And then, in a move the younger sister could’ve only picked up from watching her older sister in action, Annie punched Judy in the shoulder. It barely hurt, but she rubbed the spot and winced. “Um, ow! Don’t need to add a broken shoulder to my list of injuries. Didn’t know you were such a sore loser.”

Annie rolled her eyes again. “Like that even hurt. Big baby. And I didn’t do that ‘cause you won. I did that ‘cause you fibbed. You keep looking at that door, because you’re worried about Nick. I know I’m right.”

Judy smirked. “So what if I am. What do you have to do with that?"

Annie gave her sister a no nonsense glower. "I know about Nick. So you can bet I’m the best person to talk to about him." Judy didn't say anything in response, just stared blankly back, and her reaction (or lack thereof) caused Annie to let out an exaggerated sigh. "Didn’t I ask if you guys were married when I saw him in the phone that first time? I knew you were together. And you were."

"We weren’t married though, Annie, and we still aren’t,” Judy corrected. “And it doesn’t matter anyway. You can’t help. Not that there’s anything I need help with concerning Nick.”

They were sitting at a table in the dining area, but after Judy doubted that she could help, Annie stood up on her chair and planted her hands on her hips, looking just like their mom when she was about to deliver a lecture.

"I can help you guys," Annie said, her voice verging on angry. "I might not be a smart cop like you, but I know Nick. We’re friends. And I know you’re upset. So tell me what’s going on you big dumdum.”

Judy could clearly see she’d hurt Annie’s feelings when her little sister was resorting to name calling. "Okay, I'll hear you out. Just, please, sit down with me again."

Annie nodded. "I'm sorry I got so crazy. But you make me bonkers sometimes, Judy."

Judy hid a chuckle behind her paw. No need to let her so very serious sister know just how adorable she looked when upset. "No, I like that you're passionate,” Judy replied. “Believe me, it's nice to see someone who feels their emotions strongly. In fact, you kind of remind me of … me."

Unfortunately, Judy realized too late that telling Annie she was like her was not the compliment she thought it was. "You?” The little bunny made a displeased face. “I’m way cooler. I’m like Nick, not you," she said, raising her brows, and Judy went to hide another laugh.

“What was I thinking? You’re right, you _are_ much cooler than me,” Judy agreed, and Annie seemed to relax a bit after hearing this. "So, you want to know why I’m a little worried about Nick?" she asked, deciding to reward her sister’s determination. If Judy had learned anything in her 26 years, it was that tenacity got you what you wanted, and that was a lesson she wanted to pass on to her sister.

"You can tell me everything, sis,” Annie said, using her most serious voice.

“Well, a little while ago, I found out that Nick was going to propose to me. But then the bad stuff happened,” Judy pointed to her wrist splint and Annie nodded solemnly. “And it got put on hold. At least, I think it’s on hold. Actually I don’t know and I keep wondering if maybe he’s not going to ask me anymore. But shhhh, you can’t tell anyone. Not Mom or Dad or even Nick. He doesn’t know that I know. It’ll be our little secret, okay? Sister to sister.”

“Okay,” Annie agreed, but then began tapping her chin like she was in deep contemplation. She repeated an overt thinking noise a few times before finally asking, “You care about Nick, don't you? You’d do anything for him?" Annie sounded like some therapist on a TV show, and Judy wondered what her parents were letting her watch. This definitely wasn’t _Wrangled_ territory.

"How could I not care about him? He's my everything. I love him,” she answered, while trying to keep a straight face and give Annie a proper reaction for the mock therapy session she was trying to act out.

“Then why don’t _you_ ask him?” She pointed at Judy right between the eyes.

“Ask him what?” Judy brought Annie’s paw down.

“To marry you. If you’re worried he’s not going to do it anymore, then you do it. Easy peasy, problem solved. Case closed.” Annie clapped her paws like she was congratulating herself.

Judy giggled softly. "Oh, I don't know, Annie. Proposing is kinda big deal, and something Nick planned. I don't want to one up him ... at least not with this. Plus girls don't usually ask boys that question. It’s tradition for the boy to do it."

Annie hopped up onto the table and walked across the checkerboard, causing the pieces to scatter. Then she patted Judy’s head condescendingly. "Oh, Judy, Judy, Judy. We can’t let tradition keep us in our little boxes of who the world thinks we should be. Girls can ask boys. Just like rabbits can be police officers?"

Judy put up a finger, getting ready to argue with Annie, but then she placed it back down. "You’re right." She felt stupid for letting her sister think that a mammal couldn’t do something just because of their gender. Annie was repeating lines that Judy had said herself. “And it sounds like you’ve been listening to the advice of a very smart mammal. So, thank you. I’ll take the time to think about what you just said.”

“Well, my work here is done.” Annie lifted her chin victoriously and then walked back over the checkerboard, causing more pieces to shift and fall to the ground. “See you around, sis. Winner has to clean up,” she said, before racing away to chase after one of her other siblings, who had started a game of tag.

Judy didn’t actually have to pick up the game. Her mom redirected Annie back over to the mess, explaining that even if those were the rules of the house, it was silly to think Judy could pick everything up in her current state. “Sorry,” Annie mumbled as she began cleaning up the checkers on the floor.

“That’s okay, therapist Annie,” Judy joked, and then turned to her mom who was hovering over her kit to make sure she did a good job. “Hey, Mom, could you help me to the guest room?” Judy asked.

“Are you feeling okay?” her mom asked, glancing up. “Do you need to lie down?”

“Oh, no, I’m fine. I just wanted to look in my luggage for something.”

Her mom nodded, and after gathering Judy’s crutches, she helped her into the guest room and closed the door. Judy stayed motionless for a moment, listening to the sounds outside the room, and once she was sure none of her nosy siblings would bother her, Judy maneuvered herself to the ground, then scooted next to her suitcase. She rummaged through her and Nick’s clothing, until finding a large clear plastic bag with her Goals journal inside. Judy usually brought it along whenever she traveled. It was just a helpful way to remember what she was trying to accomplish at the moment. And as she flipped through the pages, lingering on one in particular, an idea began to hatch inside her head.

If it worked, Judy would have to make sure to thank Annie for her impromptu therapy session. 

* * *

 

“I made reservations for us to go out to eat tomorrow,” Judy stated as Nick helped her dress for bed.

“Really? When did you do that?” he asked, pulling the night shirt down over her head. Judy had insisted she could dress herself, but Nick wouldn’t let her take on even the mildest of tasks. It was part of his whole making up for being an idiot deal.

“When you were gone today with my dad. Mom says we can take the truck. Obviously you’ll have to drive.”

Nick grimaced. He wasn’t exactly the best at driving a stick shift. He’d barely passed his driver’s test with an automatic. It had been helpful to have a friend at the DMV. Without Flash, Nick most definitely would’ve failed. He didn't mention this to Judy though. After all the disappointment he’d put her through, Nick didn’t have the heart to let her down. He’d figure out a way to make it work.  

“What’s the frown for?” Judy asked.

Nick pulled his face into a smirk. “That wasn’t a frown. That was my smolder.”

Judy didn’t look convinced. “Either you're lying or don’t know what I find sexy and neither of those are a good thing,” she said straightforwardly, carefully placing herself on the edge of the guest bed.

“Oh, I know what you find sexy?” Nick teased, while raising his brows a few times.

“Definitely not that face either,” she taunted with a chuckle.

“Okay, how about this?” Nick asked, and kneeling on the floor so that he was at her level, his mouth found hers. Then slowly, Nick guided her body back against the bed, but Judy resisted, pushing against Nick’s chest to get him to sit up again.

“Not at my parent’s house.”

Nick laughed. “Well, what did they expect when they let us share a bed this time?” His mouth found the base of her neck and he kissed her again, but Judy shoved his snout away with a giggle.

“There will be plenty of time for that when we get back home, but for now let’s just … not give my parents anything to walk in on, okay? That is a can of worms I never want to open.”

Heaving a sigh of surrender, Nick moved to sit beside her on the bed. “Is snuggling allowed?” he asked.

Judy smiled demurely. “That’s always allowed.”

After helping Judy into bed, Nick went to turn out the lights, and then moving in beside her, he pulled Judy into him. And slowly Nick began to drift into sleep, while thinking of how in two days Clawhauser would be heading out there to help him and he’d be able to pull off his second take on Judy’s proposal. “I love you, Carrots,” he whispered into one of her ears that had flopped near the tip of his nose.

“I love you too,” she murmured back into the darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter should be the last. Thanks to PullTogether for always taking the time to help me polish up my work.


	11. Chapter 11

Nick leaned under the open hood of the truck, trying to pretend he knew what the hell he was doing. Something was wrong with the engine and Nick was 99% sure he was the reason why. It appeared that watching a few videos online on how to drive a stick shift wasn’t as helpful as he thought it would be.

Judy was in the passenger seat. Nick couldn’t see her, because of the hood’s position, but he could hear her as she shouted for him to check the something or other on the whatsit thingamajig. The words sounded foreign to him and that’s when he knew the charade had to end. This truck wasn’t going to get fixed- not by him anyway. He had no idea what any of the engine parts he was looking at were called. Nick lowered the hood and got back into the driver’s seat.

“What are you doing?” Judy asked.

“Well, I can tell you what I’m _not_ doing, fixing this truck, because ... I don’t know how,” Nick admitted with a sigh. “I can’t drive a stick shift, and I definitely can’t fix one. Public transportation ruined me for life. I can drive an automatic and that’s where my knowledge of cars, trucks, and automobiles ends.” He stared at the wheel in front of him, then turned to give Judy a wry smile, hoping it would charm her into a forgiving mood.

Judy’s mouth twisted in confusion. “Then why did you tell me you could?”

Nick leaned back into his seat. “I didn’t so much as tell you I could, as I omitted certain facts, because like always, I was overly confident that I could figure it out. And since we’re now stranded in your parents’ truck, that obviously means I couldn’t. But also,” he glanced briefly away and frowned, “I didn’t want to disappoint you. Ever since ... well, _you know_ ... I’ve wanted to make sure I never let you down again. Every time I think back to those fights, I just see the hurt in your face. I don’t ever want to be the cause of that expression again.”

Judy was quiet while staring at him and then suddenly she chuckled; it wasn’t the reaction he’d been expecting. “Nick,” his name was spoken like a soft reprimand. “Not going out to eat isn’t the same disappointment as thinking you’re going to break up with me. I would’ve just asked my dad to drop us off. Without a doubt he’d have made the ride as awkward as possible, but he would’ve gotten us there. Which is preferable to our current situation of being stuck out here in the middle of cornfields halfway between Bunnyburrow and Meadowland.”

The restaurant was one town over. A nicer eatery that served more than just Bunnyburrows typical carrot dishes. But now they wouldn’t get there in time and it was all his fault. Nick felt like an idiot. “Uh, sorry, didn’t think of that. My brain's been all screwy ever since ... _you know_.”

Judy reached out her paw and rested it against his. “I wish you would stop calling it, _you know_. Yes, a really bad thing happened, but it’s okay for us to talk about it. You don’t have to tiptoe around the subject by saying  _you know_ , all the time.”

She’d already mentioned this once to Nick, but it had become an involuntary reflex for him to use the vague inference of _you know_ , rather than say what actually happened. “Yeah, it’s still hard for me though. But I guess, that’s nothing compared to what you went through.”

“I don’t think we should weigh our pain to see whose is heavier. It doesn’t matter, because in the end it was bad for us both ... but I think …” Judy glanced out the window, her eyes staring at the pink and purple hues of a setting sun that reminded Nick of Judy’s irises.

“You think what?” he gently pressed.

She turned back to look at him. “I think we don’t have to talk about what happened right now. And I also think it’ll take my dad a bit to get out here after I call. So, let’s turn this Nick screwy brained idea of thinking he could drive a stick shift when he doesn’t know how, into something romantic and watch the sunset from the bed of the truck.”

“What about the restaurant?”

“Well, I think it’s pretty obvious we’re going to miss our reservation. And you know what? I like the idea of watching the stars come out with you better than eating some overpriced meal.”

Judy’s suggestion was so typical of her. Take something bad and turn it into a positive. It’s what he loved about her. “Do you want me to quote one of your favorite romantic comedies,” Nick asked, with a wink. “Watching the sunset is totally a Hare and Bunny thing.”

Before Judy could answer, Nick had already exited the vehicle and was helping her out of the passenger side door and into his arms. “Not really. They’d probably be arguing over what colors they saw, and then Hare would say something sexist, like pink was only for girls.”

“Oh, I think I could find some sexist phrases in the gutter of my mind if you want,” Nick teased, while carrying Judy, and after gingerly setting his girlfriend down in the back of the truck, he loomed over her. “Or perhaps this is a Mr. Darcy and Miss Bennet moment.” Nick kneeled and taking Judy’s injured paw into his own, he kissed it.

Judy giggled and pulled her paw away. “No, this is strictly a Judy and Nick moment. Those movies are great escapism, but I’d rather not compare what we have to anyone else.”

Nick sat down beside her. “Because we’re not like anyone else.”

“That’s for sure,” Judy replied. “But, I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Judy then reached into the tote bag that she’d carried along with her into the back of the truck, and pulled out her phone to call home. “There’s no rush,” Nick heard her mention to her dad on the other end, and right before she ended the call, Judy begged, “And please don’t bring the bus.”

Nick knew about the bus. With a family as large as Judy’s, if they ever went anywhere as a family the bus was pulled out, and it was a sore spot of embarrassment with Judy. “So, no bus?” Nick chuckled.

“No, he’s bringing the tractor, which will take him a little while longer, but that’s okay. More time for us to watch the sunset. They really do need to get a second vehicle that isn’t a bus.” Judy reached into her bag and pulled out two protein bars. “Hungry?”

“You always come prepared, don’t you?”

“Is there any other way to be?”

“For you, I don’t think so.”

The truck had broken down on a stretch of dirt road that didn’t see much traffic, giving Nick and Judy privacy as they sat comfortably in silence, ate their protein bars and watched the sky change colors over the tips of the long stretch of corn rows against the horizon. It reminded Nick of what life had been like before the fiasco at the Gazelle concert- filled with all the charming and humdrum qualities of domestic life he’d grown to love. Just him and Judy being a normal boring couple, watching the sunset.

“I missed this,” Nick voice broke over the late summer sounds of crickets and insects buzzing around them. “Of just you and me, enjoying the quieter parts of life together. Makes me think of a future where all the bad moments can be drowned out by the good ones. Like right now.”

“I feel the same way," Judy agreed with a nod. "That it doesn’t matter what happens to us, because as long as we have each other, those bad moments can be snuffed out by our love." Then the two shared a kiss that was much too brief for Nick’s liking. He’d been hoping for a little more, but Judy had other plans. “Speaking of the future ... I brought something along that I want you to see. I was going to show you at the restaurant, but this is better.”

Judy turned and for a third time that evening, pulled something out of her tote. “Your goals journal?” Nick asked, raising his brows questioningly after she handed him the spiral notebook that had been a staple in Judy’s life for as long as he’d known her. It caused a sense of deja vu to rush over Nick. There’d been another time she’d shown it to him, a little over a year ago.

“Well, I wrote something new inside. A goal that I thought you might be interested in seeing. But you better hurry and look while there’s still enough daylight.”

Judy leaned against Nick as he began flipping through the journal until reaching the last page with words on it. The handwriting was similar to what a kit’s might look like, scribbles that were barely legible, proving Judy had made the goal in the last few days. Nick had injured her writing paw when he’d yanked her away from the rhino and she’d been using her less practiced right paw for writing ever since.

“Goal,” Nick read out loud, and then had to squint to figure out the rest, “Ask Nack to meet me? Who’s Nack?”

Judy took the journal out of his paws. “It doesn’t say Nack. That’s your name. And I’m not trying to meet you.” She placed her paw under the word he thought was meet, and slowly dragged her finger to the right. “That's an M, an A, two Rs and a Y.”

“Marry?” Nick glanced up at her, his eyes widening.

Judy nodded and sent him a shy smile. “Soooo, will you?”

Nick’s sense of deja vu was now fully realized. This was just like the last time, only now he felt a much different emotion pulse through him. Before, his heart had soared at the idea that Judy could actually love him back, now his heart plummeted knowing all he’d planned - the big proposal that had been days in the making- was no longer in play. You couldn’t propose to someone who’d just proposed to you. And it caused Nick to say something that probably wasn’t the best reaction to have when someone was asking you to marry them. He swore under his breath.

Judy eyed him curiously. “Did you just say _shit_ to my proposal?”

Nick shook his head, ready to backpedal, but then a little voice inside his brain reminded him of the promise he’d made after coming to realize how much he’d hurt Judy. He’d never lie to her again; never try to fix a problem by shutting down. He’d always be open about everything, and if she wanted to be the one to propose, then he was fine with that. So what if his proposal had slipped through his paws. It didn’t matter. Well, maybe it would to Clawhauser, who’d no longer be witness to his favorite couple’s engagement. But to Nick it all seemed inconsequential, because Judy was what really mattered, not who got to propose first. “Well, yes, I did use that word,” Nick admitted. “But that’s because … I was going to ask you the same thing tomorrow.”

Judy gasped. “Oh no, I ruined your proposal?” Her paws flew up to her mouth.

“No, no, not so much as ruined it as switched roles with me. Which is fine. I just had this plan to bring your family and closest friends together and ask you in front of them. Clawhauser is actually coming on a train in the morning and yesterday I went out and visited Gideon Grey with your dad to ask him to be there too, along with some of his pies to celebrate afterward. I didn’t even tell your mom until tonight, because I was so worried you’d find out and …” Nick let his words fall away, realizing he was rambling, and that’s when he noticed the tears in Judy’s eyes. “Wait, why are you crying?”

“Because I took away your special moment. I ruined your-”

But Nick didn’t let her finish. “You didn’t ruin anything, you emotional bunny,” he said, and then silenced Judy with his mouth, moving his softly against hers and whispering, “Yes,” into their kiss.

“Yes?” Judy repeated, her breath mixing with his.

“Yes, I’ll marry you,” Nick clarified, and gently pulled Judy into his arms.

“You will?”

Nick could hear the smile in her voice, but also a tiny bit of surprise. “You didn’t think I’d say yes?” he asked, unable to keep a smirk from forming on his face.

“I guess I thought you would, but it’s still different to hear you accept it out loud.”

Nick gripped Judy tighter in his arms. “There’s no going back now. You’ll never be able to get rid of me, you know that, right?”

“Why would I ever want to do that?”

Nick could think of a few reasons, but knew her question had been rhetorical, so instead he kissed her again, and kept going until Judy was breathing heavily. Then gently, he leaned down with her in the bed of the truck and moved his mouth to her neck, but hesitated after hearing her say, “Wait.”

“Wait?” Nick whispered against her throat. “Wait for what?”

“In my bag, there’s a blanket.”

Nick pulled away and raised a brow. It was dark, the stars were just now starting to become visible, but Judy was able to decipher his confused expression.

“To cover us,” she explained.

When it dawned on him what his girlfriend (now fiancée) was implying, his mouth quirked up on one side. “I wasn’t planning on taking our celebration that far. What else you got in that bag? Just how prepared were you for tonight?”

“Shut up, and just get it out, okay?” Judy grumbled, but he could hear humor hidden in her annoyance. “There’s not much time before my dad gets here.”

“Well, there’s a mood killer if I ever heard one.” Nick chuckled, but did as Judy asked. Then positioning himself beside her again, he cupped the side of her face. “So, let me get this straight, we can't do this at your parents' place, but the back of their truck is okay?”

“This is different. I'm allowed to be little reckless when the occasion calls for it. I figure if I’m brave enough to propose to you, I'm brave enough to do this.”

Nick smiled as he pulled the blanket up over them, and then for the next few minutes, the two became very familiar with the repetitive squeaks a truck can make even when broken down. And when they emerged from under their cover, fumbling with buttons and zippers, Nick felt the ring in his pocket. The same one he’d carried around with him for months now.

“Uh, Carrots,” he said, sitting up.

“Hmmm?” Judy was smoothing down her fur, but turned to look at him.

“Mind if I do the silly traditional thing and get down on one knee?” he asked, holding out the ring for her to see.

“Oh,” Judy gasped.

“It was my mom’s, but I want you to have it.” He stood in front of her, and then slid down onto one knee. “This is gonna be a Judy and Nick moment, one of those good ones you can log away in your brain to remember when things get bad.” Then Nick took a breath, pausing to savor the significance of what he was about to do. “Judy Laverne Hopps, I can’t ask you to marry me, because we’re already engaged, but I can promise you with this ring, that I’ll love you for as long as I live, and possibly even longer than that if you play your cards right.” Nick winked and then taking Judy’s paw in his, he slid the ring onto her finger. Of course, it was too big- made for a fox and not a bunny- but Judy seemed to love it anyway.

“Thank you,” she said, tears shimmering in her eyes again, only this time they were ones of happiness. “I love it.”

“So, was this night everything you ever hoped for?” Nick asked, moving to sit beside her again.

Judy was admiring the ring, but turned her violet eyes on him to answer his question. “So much more. Best truck breakdown ever,” she replied with a laugh.

“See, sometimes my screw ups can lead to good things,” Nick teased.

Then the two sat side by side, quietly watching the stars come out, and transitioning from their hugely important moment to a more mundane one. And to Nick that was perfect. It was exactly how he wanted his life with Judy to always be. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so I've reached the end of the sequel. Thanks to those who have stuck with me and offered their support with comments and kudos.


	12. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you asking, what happened afterward.

Judy’s paw kept pulling on the gold chain around her neck and moving the ring threaded through it, back and force in a repetitive motion. Nick could tell she was anxious. After spending the last few years memorizing her body language, he knew that fiddling with items was one of her nervous ticks. “Careful or you might just break your necklace and lose the ring again,” Nick said from his position standing beside her on the train station platform.

With his mom’s ring being too large, it had slipped from Judy’s finger more than once since he'd placed it there the night before, and so she had converted it into a necklace. Once they were back in Zootopia, the ring would be resized, but until then Judy made sure it was locked around her neck, safe and secure. Only problem was now she couldn’t leave it alone.

Judy’s paw stilled and she let the ring fall against her collarbone. “I’m just nervous. I don’t want Clawhauser to be upset.”

“Look, the guy is already my Best Mammal. I chose him over Finnick. He’s gotta see how significant that is and not take offense that we let our proposals flow naturally instead of saving them for him.”

But Judy wasn’t paying attention to him. “Ohhh, here he comes,” she said, her eyes darting towards the train slowly entering the station. “Maybe I should hide.” She let her crutches fall and ducked behind Nick, using his tail like a shield.

“Get back here, you crazy bunny.” Nick reached behind him and tugged a reluctant Judy back out into the open. “We decided we were going to do this together. Where’s brave Officer Hopps?”

“In Zootopia, fighting crime and not here about to disappoint her best friend,” Judy replied as Nick handed back her abandoned crutches.

“I thought you could handle anything after being brave enough to propose- that is what you said last night- or was I imagining that bravery you displayed while under the blanket with me?” Nick teased, knowing it would distract Judy with embarrassment.

But to his surprise, she barely flinched. “No, I can handle _that_ , because it involves doing something I like very much.” She smiled smugly. “This, on the other hand. Disappointing our biggest fan.” Judy groaned and her smile pulled down into a frown.

“Well, maybe I should just remind you of last night. Shock a little of that bravery back into your system.” Nick leaned in, and ignoring the mammals around them, kissed Judy just as passionately as he had the night before.

“O M Goodness! It’s my favorite couple kissing out in the open. You two are such exhibitionists!”

Clawhauser’s squeal pulled Nick out of his replay of his proposal kiss, and both he and Judy jerked away from each other, causing one of Judy’s crutches to crash to the ground. “Whoopsies,” Clawhauser said, leaning down to pick it up, but he held onto Judy’s walking aid for a moment after standing. “Wait. You’re not supposed to be here. You’re not supposed to know I’m coming.” His eyes flashed to Nick. “You told her?” Then his eyes fell down to Judy’s necklace. “You already proposed?!”

Nick rushed to calm his friend, who looked like he was on the verge of tears. “We didn’t plan it. It just sort of happened, and once the proposals were out of the bag, we couldn’t put them back in. Like literally we couldn’t. Judy kept pulling things out of her bag last night and one of them was a proposal.”

“I did do that,” Judy confirmed with an enthusiastic nod, and then went into a quick rundown of their proposals- minus some undercover blanket activity- before finishing with, “And now you don’t even have to wait to eat all those pies that were going to be at the engagement party. Nick and I are taking you to Gideon’s pie shop, and you can eat one right now. More than one if you want. Oh, and my dad is out in the parking lot with his truck. You can sit in the back and relive where the proposals actually took place.”

“Yeah, it’ll be like an amusement park ride. We’ll reenact it for you,” Nick added and Judy shot him a funny look. That last part hadn’t been planned, but the con-artist in him was on a roll, trying to seal the deal. “And if you order now we’ll even throw in this lovely set of pie plates,” Nick joked.

“You’ll do all that for me?” Clawhauser sniffled, his frown slowly easing into a hopeful grin.

“Well, I actually don’t have any pie plates,” Nick retracted. “That was a joke. But everything else …” he turned to Judy for confirmation. She nodded. “Yep, it’s a go.”

“Oh, goody! And don’t leave anything out. I want full disclosure. No holding back.” Clawhauser’s hopeful smile was now a full on beam.

 _Well, I have to leave some things out,_ Nick thought to himself, glancing at Judy who apparently had been thinking the same thing, because she giggled. “Come on, Ben. Step right up, I’ve your ticket to The Nick and Judy proposal reenactment starting in five minutes,” Nick said, imitating a carnival barker.

Clawhauser clapped his paws. “This is going to be good!” he exclaimed, and then the three friends made their way out of the station and towards the truck where Judy and Nick could imitate _some_ of the magic that had taken place there the night before.

* * *


End file.
